Inuyasha's Journal
by Shanteru
Summary: Inuyasha is in a battle with Naraku and his brood when he looses his journal. Rin finds the journal and gives it Sesshoumaru who reads it and finds out alot about his brother and Inuyasha's past. This fanfiction's rating will go up as the story goes along
1. Chapter 1 Lost and Found

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character within this fan fiction.

Chapter One: Lost and Found

Inuyasha and the gang were in their camp after another battle with Naraku. Inuyasha was sulking because he was unable to kill Naraku again. Kagome had been hurt but insisted she was fine. Inuyasha could smell the pain coming from her as she worked on their dinner. She refused to let anyone help her with it too. Inuyasha watched her closely because if she looked like she was in too much pain he was going to make her sit down and rest then he would finish their dinner. Inuyasha looked at the others in his group and noticed Shippou was drawing as usual. He really loved those crayons that Kagome brought for him. He looked over at Sango and saw that she was watching in the direction Miroku had went. He had been gone a while and she was getting worried and Inuyasha knew it.

Sango said, "I am going to go and find Miroku. He's been gone a long time."

She was about to get up when Inuyasha got up. He looked at Sango.

Inuyasha said, "Sango you stay here I will go find him. I can find him better than you in this forest. Its way to dark to rely on your eyes along."

Sango said, "Thank you Inuyasha."

Inuyasha walked off into the forest following Miroku's scent to find him. Inuyasha followed his scent pretty far from the camp. He found Miroku sitting with his back to a tree staring up at the sky. He walked out of the forest into the clearing stopped far enough away for him not to be upset.

Inuyasha said, "Miroku what are you doing this far from the camp?"

Miroku looked up and said, "Oh Inuyasha I didn't see you there."

Inuyasha said, "Come on were going back to the camp now. You have Sango really worried she was going to come out here herself but she would have gotten lost in the forest so I came because I can follow your scent. So come on lets go before we miss dinner."

Miroku went after Inuyasha back to their camp. When they reached the camp Inuyasha found that Sango was the one that was serving the dinner. Kagome was lying on her sleeping bag and she looked to be asleep to Inuyasha. They went into the camp and Sango saw Miroku and Inuyasha saw the smile on her face.

Inuyasha said, "What happened to Kagome?"

Sango said, "She almost passed out so I made her lie down before she hurt herself. She is sleeping right now. I'm going to let her sleep a little while before I wake her up to eat."

Inuyasha said, "Alright."

He took his bowl and went over by Kagome and sat down. He wanted to make sure he was near her in case something happened. He didn't know what would happen to her and he didn't want to think about it. Kagome was woken up a little while later so she could eat and after she ate everyone went to bed. Inuyasha went into the tree to write in his journal. He knew that it was stupid to still keep it and write in it but it helped him to put his feelings into it. After he had wrote in it he put it away and went to sleep himself.

The next morning the gang was involved in a battle with Kagura who was trying to get the jewel shards. After the battle Inuyasha and the others went on their way. Inuyasha didn't notice that he had dropped his journal. He wouldn't notice until later that night when he went to write in it like he did every night.

Sesshoumaru and his group walked through the forest toward the battle ground Inuyasha and group had just left. Sesshoumaru crossed the path and went into the woods across it. Jaken was right behind him but Rin was a little further behind. She crossed the path and saw a pretty brown book. She went over and picked it up and opened it. She saw the writing was almost like Sesshoumaru's writing but it was different. It was more scratched than fluid like his. She picked it up and headed off toward Sesshoumaru and Jaken. She hoped Sesshoumaru would like the book she had found.

Inuyasha and the others had stopped for the night and everyone was asleep. He went to write in his journal when he found that he didn't have it. He looked all over for it and then headed back toward the battle ground and didn't find it. He didn't see it anywhere. So he went back to the camp. Kagome had woken up and noticed that Inuyasha was nowhere to be found. So she got up and headed the direction that he seemed to go in.

Inuyasha saw Kagome standing on the hill waiting for him. He ran over there and wrapped his haori around her.

She said, "Inuyasha why are you out here?"

Inuyasha said, "I was looking for something I lost that's all."

Kagome said, "What did you loose?"

Inuyasha didn't say anything then said, "It's personal. Lets just leave it at that."

He walked back toward camp when Kagome grabbed his hand and they walked back to their camp hand in hand. She told him that it would turn up eventually and he agreed.

Sesshoumaru and his group had made camp in a clearing about a mile from the battle field. Jaken was asleep now and Rin got up and walked over to Sesshoumaru. He didn't look at her but put his hand on her head.

Sesshoumaru said, "Why are you not asleep Rin?"

Rin said, "Rin has something for you Lord Sesshoumaru."

He looked at her and saw the book in them. He took it and opened it then saw the scrawling letters so like his own and knew that it was his brother's book.

Sesshoumaru said, "Rin where did you get this?"

Rin said, "Rin found it on the dirt path we passed. Rin thought you would like it so Rin picked it up for you. Did Rin do something wrong?"

He said, "No you didn't do anything wrong Rin. Now go to sleep we are leaving early tomorrow."

Rin said, "Ok Lord Sesshoumaru. Good night."

Sesshoumaru said, "Good night Rin."

When everyone was asleep he sat by the fire and looked at the book in his hands. He knew that it belonged to Inuyasha and that he should return it to him but he couldn't help it he wanted to read it but he also knew it was wrong to read it. He couldn't help the feeling.

He said, "I'll only read one page then I will give it back to him."

Sesshoumaru opened the book to the first page and read:

My name is Inuyasha I am a half demon. My mother was Izayoi and she was human. My father's name was Inutaishou he was the great dog demon of the Western Lands. I don't have any memories of my father but I do of my mother. I live with my mother in a little village in the Western Lands. My older half brother Sesshoumaru is now the Lord. He doesn't like me much but I think that he just doesn't like me very much actually. I really don't know what he doesn't like me I guess its just because I am a half demon. I wish I knew why he treated me the way he does. I guess I will never know why he treats me the way he does. I just hope that one day he will find a way to love me the way my mom does. I guess that's hoping to much. I don't remember much of my brother either. I know one thing my mom says that my father was strong and so is my brother. I know what I will do I will become just as strong as Sesshoumaru and my father and maybe I will surpass them and then he may like me. I know that to demons power is everything.. So if I become stronger that my brother then maybe he will love me like I love him.. Mommy says everyone asks Kami to make sure that their loved ones are safe and sound. I will ask Kami to watch over my big brother and my mommy for me.

Sesshoumaru couldn't believe that Inuyasha had loved him. He had prayed for him as well. He was astonished that he had made a vow to get stronger than himself and their father. He smiled at the thought of his little brother trying to become stronger by climbing trees and running around like a little child. Sesshoumaru knew there was more to read on that page so he continued to read.

Mommy says that we will be going into the village tomorrow to get some things. I will get to play with children my own age tomorrow. I am so excited I've only played with mommy before. She says I will have to be mindful of my claws because they can hurt people. I promised her that I would mind my claws so she wouldn't have to worry about me. Mommy gave me this book to write in so it would improve it. She says that my writing is nothing like my fathers or my brothers. So I am to get as good as them before she will let me write to my big brother. She wants me to ask him to come and stay with us for a week so I have someone to play with besides her. She gets tired but I am energetic so I can play longer than her. I sometimes spend all day outside and come back home around dinner time even though I hunt and eat animals that I can catch I still come home to eat with mommy. I never let her see the blood on my face or my claws because she got upset with me when I eat raw meat so I just eat it and then wash up in the stream not far from the house and come back to eat with her. I hope that when my writing does get better and I do write Sesshoumaru he comes and stays with us. Mommy isn't much fun sometimes. She gets tired too easily and then has to go inside and rest. I wonder what is wrong with her she says she is just tired but she smells funny. Her scent is normally a mix of herb tea and pine needles but lately her scent has change to one of a dying animal I saw in the woods once but I don't think there is anything wrong with her. She would tell me if there was something wrong with her.

Sesshoumaru understood that scent he had smelled and felt bad because Inuyasha had no idea that the smell he had smelt on his mother's scent had been the scent of death. He hadn't known that they wanted him to come and stay with them for a while. He had never gotten a note from Inuyasha at all. He wondered what else was in this book of his. He knew it was wrong but he couldn't help it he wanted to know more of the side Inuyasha kept to himself.

We went to the village today. I went to play with the children but when I got there they all looked at me. One of the older children probably about as old as my own brother had the ball. I asked if I could play with them. And he said, "Oh look the halfbreed wants to play." He then threw the ball and said, "Go fetch it Inuyasha." I went after it and when I turned around they were all gone. My mom showed up so I took the ball over to her and I looked up at her and asked her what a halfbreed was and she knelt down in front of me and wrapped her arms around me and cried. That was the first time I saw my mother's tears. I never found out what Halfbreed ment but I know my mom would tell me if I was to know what it ment. Well I am going to go hunting tomorrow morning but I have to be home before the sun sets because it's the night of the no moon. I will be human then and it scares me to change into a human. I hate it when I turn into a human. I can't see as well as I can as a half demon. I also can't hear as well and when I sleep next to my mom and I transform I can no longer hear her heart beat and it scares me. I also can not smell things as well anymore. I am afraid something will come and hurt mommy and me. I won't be able to protect her when I am human. I know that because I am a half demon that I will have to deal with my human side. I plan on not waking mommy tomorrow night when I turn human and I am going to go to the village because they are having a wedding and I want to go. I want to see what happens there. I also want to see if they know its me because if they don't then I will go and play with the children at night on the no moon so I have someone to play with.

Sesshoumaru had never known what happened to Inuyasha while he was human. He decided to keep reading to see what else his brother had said while he was just a little child.

I went to the village last night and I had so much fun. I ate so much that I think I gained at least twelve pounds since yesterday morning and this morning. Mommy didn't notice I was gone. I got home before sunrise and she never knew the difference. Mommy isn't here with me right now she went to see the priestess in the village. She hasn't been feeling well lately and she wanted to see if the priestess would give her something for it. I am in a clearing not far from the old well. I love the tree I am under. I am not old enough to climb it so I am sitting under it. Mommy says it's a sacred tree. I don't know what that means all I know is that it is a nice place to sit and write or just to think. What I find weird is that I can feel someone else here with me but I can't find out who it is. I heard her name called today and its Kagome but I haven't seen her yet. I hope when she comes back she will play with me. I am really lonely here without anyone to play with. No one but mommy ever plays with me. I can't wait until I get better at writing then I can write my brother and then he will play with me. Oh the girl is back I can feel her through the tree. Its like she is here and like she isn't. I think she is a ghost from another time that just likes this tree. I am going to see if she wants to play with me.

Sesshoumaru found it fascination that Inuyasha and Kagome had met when they were both little through that sacred tree he had been pinned too. I wonder what happened between them or if they realized that it was each other they were talking to through that very tree. Sesshoumaru turned his attention back to the book. He had already read four and a half pages. He continued to read.

Well she didn't want to play with me she ran off screaming. So I think I will go home and wait for mommy to come home. I hope she is better today I want her to play with me. Well I am home and I am sitting on the bed waiting for mommy to come back from the village. It is getting late and mommy hasn't come back yet. I guess she must have stayed with the priestess tonight. I will be fine she will be back in the morning I know mommy will be back in the morning..


	2. The Western Lord shows his true feelings

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I so however own the plot and any other characters.

Chapter Two: The Western Lord shows his true feelings.

Sesshoumaru found he had hit the end of the page and when he turned the page he noticed that the hand writing had changed dramatically. It was kind of scary it was like there was a hug chunk missing from his brother's life. So Sesshoumaru continued to read.

Well I know its been a while since I last wrote in this. I looked back and realized the last time I wrote in this book was the night my mother died. I right now am sitting in my favorite tree. Priestess Kikyo agreed with what my mother had said about it being a sacred tree. I can still feel Kagome here. I wonder why she's crying? Kikyo is so nice to me. She doesn't care if I am a half demon. I know the villagers don't like the fact that I hang around here a lot. But I really don't care what they think. I promised Kikyo that I wouldn't let her get hurt. A demon attacked the village in search for the Shikon no tama and Kikyo defended the village or at least she tried to. But the demon got the best of her and she was knocked into one of the huts. So when she was thrown I jumped in and killed the demon with my Iron Reaper Soul Stealer and then I went to make sure Kikyo was alright and she was. She had seen what I had done and so had the villagers. She had gotten up with my help and turned to the villagers and said, "Do you see what Inuyasha has done for us? He has saved us from the demon. He didn't have to do it but he did. Even after you treat him with malice and hatred he still chose to save you. Take that into consideration the next time you are met with Inuyasha." I was surprised at what she said. She had defended me and when we were out of the way I wrapped my arms around her and asked her if she alright. I am to met her in a meadow tomorrow so I can use the Shikon no tama to become human. That way she and I can be together once and for all. I love Kikyo with all my heart but something feels wrong with all of this but its probably nothing. The next time I write in this book I will be human.

Sesshoumaru was astonished to find that he had actually loved the Priestess that had betrayed him. He could only wonder at what had happened during his brother's absence. He had read another five pages when the writing changed again. This time to the writing he knew was his brothers hand writing.

Well I know now how long I have been pinned to that sacred tree I like so much. I was pinned to that tree for fifty years. Fifty years I waited for someone to pull that arrow out of my chest and to top it all off the one to do it is a girl named Kagome Higurashi. She is fifteen years old same age I am or I was when I was pinned to the tree. She is the reincarnation of Kikyo. She if from a place she calls Tokyo. I have no idea where that is but if its anywhere near here I am glad. She has put beads on my neck that are called the beads of subjugation with a word called "sit" she can subjugate me into the ground anytime she pleases I think she enjoys doing it though. I have to keep protecting her. She brought the jewel back with her. I want the jewel to become a full fledged demon like Sesshoumaru. I wonder how my brother is doing. I haven't seen him since I got woke up. I think I will try to find out if anyone knows anything about him and find some things out. I just hope Kami is still listening to me. Because that way I can ask him to watch over my brother till we meet again.

Sesshoumaru looked up from the book and toward the sky. He saw that it was almost a new moon. He wondered himself how Inuyasha was doing. He got up and put Inuyasha's journal into his Kimono and went up on top of a hill. He looked out over the whole valley he knew a song that Inuyasha was sure to know. He sniffed his brother out on the wind then turned toward him and took a deep breath and howled in perfect inu-youkai, _Inuyasha listen to me alright. I think we need to talk. Can you meet me in the clearing by the water fall not that far from your camp?_

(Sesshoumaru is in blue and Inuyasha is in red)

Inuyasha and his friends had just been attacked by Kagura and they were sitting there around thefire when Inuyasha and the others heard the howling. Inuyasha's ears perched up at what the howling said and it was weird for Sesshoumaru to contact him this way.

Kagome said,_ "_Inuyasha what's wrong?"

Inuyasha said, "Nothing is wrong."

Miroku said, "Who is it do you know?"

Inuyasha said, "Its Sesshoumaru."

Kagome said, "What does he want Inuyasha?"

He said, "Sesshoumaru wants to talk to me. He wants me to meet him by the waterfall not far from here."

Kagome and the others looked at him and he was looking in the direction his brother was in.

Miroku said, "Well he is your brother. Maybe you should go and talk to him."

Kagome said, "Are you going to go? What if it's a trap?"

Inuyasha said, "I am going and your right it could be a trap but if I don't go then he will take that as a personal insult and he will only get angry with me. Then he could hurt you guys. So I will be back before we leave alright. Just be careful that Naraku doesn't decided to send someone here."

Inuyasha got up and looked at Kagome. Kagome looked up into those beautiful amber eyes she loved so much.

Inuyasha said, "If there is any problem shoot one of your arrows into the sky and I will see it alright."

Kagome said, "Alright Inuyasha."

They all watched as Inuyasha tilted his head back and howled in semi perfect Inu-youkai, _Sesshoumaru I will meet you there. Sorry if my inu-youkai is a little bad I only started to learn it._

He put his head down and took off running toward the waterfall leaving his friends behind at their camp site.

Sesshoumaru heard Inuyasha's reply and went back to his own camp and woke Jaken up.

Jaken said, "Lord Sesshoumaru what is it?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I am leaving to go talk to Inuyasha I will be back before we leave. Watch Rin if anything happens to her I will hold you personally responsible."

With that Sesshoumaru headed off toward the meeting spot where Inuyasha would be waiting for him.

Inuyasha had arrived at the Waterfall and was sitting on the rock in the center of the lake. He wanted to show Kagome this place it was so beautiful here. He heard Sesshoumaru arrive before he saw him.

Inuyasha said, "What do you want to talk about Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru stopped right next to the waterfall and saw where Inuyasha had chosen to wait for him and smiled to himself.

He said, "You like it here huh?"

Inuyasha said, "Its nice. I know Kagome would like it."

Sesshoumaru said, "Do you plan on bringing her here?"

Inuyasha said, "I would like to except I don't know why I feel so weird here its like my demon half is out but I can control it. Why is that do you know?"

Sesshoumaru laughed a little and said, "Yeah I know little brother. Its because this place is sacred to the inu-youkai."

Inuyasha turned to Sesshoumaru and looked at him in the waning moon light. He thought it made his brother look more handsome than ever. He wondered how Sesshoumaru looked under the full moon.

Inuyasha said, "How exactly is it a sacred spot to our kind?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Come over here and we will talk."

Inuyasha got up and jumped over to his brother. He stood on a rock right in front of Sesshoumaru who smiled directly at him. Inuyasha had never seen Sesshoumaru smile at all. He liked to see his older brother smile it was nice.

Sesshoumaru said, "Come on."

He jumped into the nearest tree and sat with his back against the trunk. Inuyasha followed Sesshoumaru up into the tree and sat facing him.

Sesshoumaru said, "Come here Inuyasha."

Inuyasha went toward his brother slowly Sesshoumaru opened his arms and Inuyasha looked at him with a curious look. Sesshoumaru waved his hand at Inuyasha who went toward him. Sesshoumaru looked at him and noticed he was being cautious.

Sesshoumaru said, "I'm not going to bite come here."

Inuyasha went over to him and Sesshoumaru turned him so that Inuyasha's back was against his chest. Sesshoumaru put his arms around Inuyasha and knew that he had scared his little brother. Sesshoumaru put left cheek against Inuyasha's head and took a deep breath. Inuyasha thought _Is he sniffing me? Why is my brother sniffing me? Why is he acting like he'll never see me again? Wait is he.._

Inuyasha said, "Sesshoumaru is something wrong with you? Is that why you are acting this way with me?"

Inuyasha knew the panic had crept into his voice but at this point he didn't care. Sesshoumaru heard the panic in his little brother's voice and smiled at how he was concerened with his health. Sesshoumaru knew why he was worried and knew that he wasn't he thought back to Inuyasha's journal. Sesshoumaru held his hand up so Inuyasha could smell his scent.

Sesshoumaru said, "Do I smell different Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha took his brother's arm in his own hand and smelt him and found he smelled the same so he nodded his head no.

Sesshoumaru said, "There is nothing wrong with me. I just wanted to spend time with you that's all. Am I allowed to spend time with my little brother?"

Inuyasha tilted his head toward Sesshoumaru and saw he was telling the truth. He smiled even though he knew that it would be a show of his weakness. But in response to his smile Sesshoumaru wrapped his arms tighter around him and then nuzzled his neck with his nose and earned a giggle from Inuyasha because it tickled.


	3. The Inu Brothers are Together at Last

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character.

Chapter Three: The Inu brother's are together at last

Inuyasha knew that Sesshoumaru didn't always show this side of himself so he was going to take advantage of it.

Inuyasha said, "How is this place sacred to our kind Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "This place is sacred to our kind because its where we do the ritual that marries us to our mates. This is the place where father married my mother and your mother here."

Inuyasha said, "How is that done Sesshoumaru?"

He looked at Inuyasha and saw that he was looking right at him.

Sesshoumaru said, "You take your prospective mate to the center of the lake where you were waiting for me. Then you stand there facing each other under a full moon and you bite her neck and then she bites yours. Then you take her blood from her fang and drip it on her finger and she does the same to make it solid. It becomes a ring of your choice. To get the gem that you want you use the moon's tears. If you are ment to be with each other then your ancestors will gift you with the moon's tears."

Inuyasha said, "How is that possible Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I honestly don't know Inuyasha."

Sesshoumaru thought back to what his journal had said about him actually loving Kikyo. He looked at his brother.

Sesshoumaru said, "Did you love her Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "Did I love who?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Kikyo did you love her?"

Inuyasha said, "Yeah I did. I loved her with all my heart and she betrayed me."

Sesshoumaru said, "If she betrayed you then why do you go off to see her whenever she is near? Don't you know it hurts Kagome to see you running off to be with Kikyo."

Inuyasha said, "Why does it hurt her its not like she loves me or anything? I have a question for you sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Kagome loves you little brother as much as you loved Kikyo. I know because I have seen it with my own eyes. Why is you question?"

Inuyasha moved away from his brother and turned to face him on the tree branch. Sesshoumaru had no idea why he had done this by to him Inuyasha was just making it easier for him to read his emotions better.

Inuyasha said, "Do you think its wrong for me to still love Kikyo after all she has done to me?"

Sesshoumaru hadn't expected that answer but he had a waiting answer for it. He grabbed Inuyasha and pulled him toward himself. Sesshoumaru wrapped his arms around Inuyasha and ran his claws through his hair.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha she was your first love and you can never forget that but you can't keep loving her though. Even if she walks this earth there is nothing left of her. She died Inuyasha a long time ago alright. Its ok to want revenge for what happened to her and yourself but its not ok to live in the past. You have someone here willing to protect you with their life even if you don't see it and you hurt them all the time by running off to be with Kikyo. Do you know who that someone is Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "Do you mean Kagome and the others?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Partially right. I mean just Kagome. Do you remember that name Inuyasha other than with her?"

Inuyasha thought and sat up he looked at Sesshoumaru with astonishment.

Inuyasha said, "There was a girl I used to hear when I sat by the god tree. I also felt her on occasions. The last time I heard or felt her there she was really sad. She was crying a lot and I couldn't figure out why that was also the day my mom died."

Sesshoumaru said, "Do you remember that girl's name?"

Inuyasha said, "Her name was Kagome Higurashi. Just like my Kagome's name. But that was a long time ago it couldn't be the same person could it?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Talk to her about it and she might remember it or she might not. If she doesn't respond in the way you did or anything then she wasn't the one."

Inuyasha nodded his head and went to leave when Sesshoumaru grabbed his arm.

He said, "We aren't done yet little brother. There are still some things I must tell you before I can let you leave alright. I have something I want to give to you as well alright. And something I want to show you."

Sesshoumaru jumped from the tree with Inuyasha right behind him. He followed Sesshoumaru through the clearing to the lake where he stopped near the water's edge. Sesshoumaru did not turn around to Inuyasha right away but he knew his little brother was standing right behind him.

Sesshoumaru said, "First off I want to give you something Inuyasha. Its something that should have been yours a long time ago. I never should have owned it in the first place."

Sesshoumaru turned and grabbed Inuyasha's hand. He started to walk into the water when Inuyasha stopped dead.

Inuyasha said, "What do you plan on doing?"

Sesshoumaru said, "What I want to give you can only be done in this lake no where else but like the wedding ritual we need to be in the center so we have to swim out there. You do know how to swim right?"

Inuyasha said, "Yeah that's not the problem. I just don't like the water that much. But I will go with you."

They both went into the water then went under the rock which was floating on the center of the lake. It was held up by demonic power that was really strong there. When they were under the water Sesshoumaru motioned for Inuyasha to close his eyes which he did. Sesshoumaru then touched his own moon mark and then touched Inuyasha's forehead where it should go and he screamed. Inuyasha tried to open his eyes but found he couldn't open them.

Inuyasha woke up on the banks of the lake. He was soaked and Sesshoumaru wasn't there. He got up slowly and called to his brother but got no answer. He looked out toward the lake and saw him lying on the rock and it didn't look like he was still alive. Inuyasha jumped out to his brother and knelt down next to him. Inuyasha shook Sesshoumaru to get him to wake up. He groaned and rolled over toward Inuyasha with his eyes still shut and Inuyasha noticed that the moon was gone from his brother's head. He looked out toward the water and saw it on his forehead. He had no idea on how it got there.

Sesshoumaru awoke a little later and explained everything.

Inuyasha said, "Why did you give me the moon mark? It marks you as the Lord of the Western Lands does it not?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I never wanted to be the Lord and father knew that. He instructed me that when I thought you were ready to be Lord to take you here and I was to give it to you. Which I did so please don't be mad at me. I made you Lord without your permission and for that I am sorry but I thought you were ready for it."

Inuyasha said, "I am not mad at you Sesshoumaru. I am shocked that you would hand this over without a fight that's all."

Sesshoumaru said, "Like I said, I never wanted it Inuyasha. It was to be yours always."

Inuyasha said, "What did you want to tell me?"

Sesshoumaru said, "That I will save for last my dear brother. Right now I have something I want to show you."

He went over to his little brother and place his hands out in front of him.

Inuyasha said, "Am I to copy you?"

He said, "Just watch first then you can try it."

Sesshoumaru had placed his hands in front of Inuyasha but when he started to gather some energy into the palms of his hand he was able to generate a ball of blue red light and he threw it into the air. Inuyasha saw it and knew that it was a distress signal.

Sesshoumaru said, "Ok I want you to try it now. All you do is you place your hands in front of you and then you concentrate on what you want your's to take the form of. Then you throw it into the air once it gets to be a whole handful with both hands."

Inuyasha held his hands out in front of him then he concentrated on what he wanted to use then when it was big enough he threw it into the air and Sesshoumaru saw that Inuyasha's was pure white but it was a dog demon in its true form.

Sesshoumaru said, "What made you chose to use our true forms?"

Inuyasha said, "Did I do it wrong?"

Sesshoumaru said, "No you did really well for your first time I am proud of you for this. I just wanted to know why you chose to use a dog demon's true form that's all oh and who you chose?"

Inuyasha said, "I chose that one because I really love him and he's always there for me whenever I need him no matter what."

Inuyasha turned his face toward Sesshoumaru and smiled. Sesshoumaru smiled back but still didn't know who it was.

Inuyasha said, "I have only see one person's true form before Sesshoumaru and that is you. So I used your true form before I took you arm away from you. Is it ok if I chose to use your true form?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah it is Inuyasha I am glad you chose someone you love to be yours. Mine is father when I need help if not its just what you saw. So if you see one like yours just five times bigger then you better come running alright."

Inuyasha said, "Same with you. I will alright don't worry."

Sesshoumaru said, "Well Inuyasha its getting late we better head back to our camps."

He had turned and was leaving when Inuyasha ran after him.

Inuyasha said, "Wait you didn't tell me what you wanted to tell me?"

Sesshoumaru said, "The thing I wanted to tell you was I love you Inuyasha nothing is ever going to change that alright. No matter how much we fight and no matter how much we argue nothing is going to change between us."

He hugged his little brother and headed back to his camp. Inuyasha lingered and then went back to his own camp.

Sesshoumaru found his group sound asleep so he went to sleep himself for a while so he wasn't too tired when they left at dawn.

Inuyasha arrived at his camp to find Kagome still awake. He went over to her and wrapped his arms around her neck scareing her he grabbed her mouth and whispered in her ear to tell her who it was. Kagome turned around and burried her head in his chest.

Kagome said, "You scared me Inuyasha."

Inuyasha said, "I am sorry Kagome I never ment to scare you. Why are you still awake you should be asleep?"

Kagome said, "I've only been awake for a little while."

Inuyasha said, "You had a bad dream huh?"

Kagome said, "Yeah I did and you weren't here to scare it away for me so I stayed awake to wait for you. Did your brother have anything interesting to say?"

Inuyasha remembered the waterfall and he got up. He grabbed Kagome's arm and pulled her up with her on her feet he picked her up and took off for the waterfall.

When they got there Kagome gasped. Inuyasha knew she would love it and he was right.

Kagome said, "Oh Inuyasha its beautiful. Thank you for bringing me here to see it."

Inuyasha wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her tighter to his chest.

He said, "I knew you would like it. Kagome when I was little I used to sit under the god tree and I used to feel a little girl through it. I could also hear her voice and many other voices through it. Well one of these times I heard her name called by I guess her father. The last day I felt and heard her was when my mother died and she was crying and very sad I tried to comfort her through the tree and I was presented with her right in front of me. She was wearing a pure black dress and had pure black hair. Her scent was that of roses."

Kagome said, "What does this have to do with me?"

Inuyasha said, "That girl's name was Kagome Higurashi. Just like you and her scent is the same as yours. I have been looking for her a lot since Kikyo died and I never realized that I already had the girl I had fallen in love with through the sacred tree right there with me the whole time."

Kagome said, "You remember that Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "Yeah I do. I am sorry that I run off to be with Kikyo. But I want you to know this Kagome I will always be yours alright. Just because I go off to meet her means nothing to me anymore because its you I always come back to and its you I will always come back to. I will not go to Hell with Kikyo anymore when I have you."

Kagome said, "What are you trying to tell me Inuyasha"

Inuyasha said, "I guess I am trying to say that I love you Kagome and I would be honored if you spent the rest of your life with me. I don't know what I will do with the jewel yet but I know one thing I will not be leaving you anytime soon."

Kagome said, "I love you too Inuyasha and I would be honored to spend my life with you."

Kagome and Inuyasha went through the whole ritual that Sesshoumaru had told him and when they were done he and her were married to each other forever. Inuyasha had earned the tears of his ancestors and he knew that this was ment to be. They went back to the camp and sat with each other.

Inuyasha knew he must have fallen asleep because the next thing he knew was he had been hit with Kagura's "dance of blades" attack. He awoke next to the edge of the clearing far from where he had been with Kagome. He looked around to see where everyone was and he saw that they were all out cold and he was too far to help them. He was getting to his feet when Naraku pinned him to the nearest tree with one of his tentacles and grabbed Kagome with another one.

Naraku said, "If you don't want her hurt you won't fight me Inuyasha. I saw that ceremony you two performed earlier so I know how much she means to you."

Inuyasha was going to attack the tentacle that held him until Naraku threatened Kagome's life. He knew he couldn't do anything that would result in Kagome getting hurt. The others were getting up until Naraku grabbed them as well and gave them the same threat. They were all in grave danger now and there was nothing they could do.

Inuyasha said, "What do you want Naraku?"

Naraku said, "I want the jewel shards what else my dear Inuyasha."

Inuyasha was trying to figure out a way to get out. He couldn't smell Kouga anywhere near. He knew of only one person who was close enough to help. He just had to get his attention and he knew that his brother would be sleeping at this moment so he couldn't use the new power Sesshoumaru had showed him. Kagome was waking up and he could see that. She screamed when she realized it was Naraku who had her and then she looked at Inuyasha who was pinned to the tree by Naraku and her other friends were stuck as well.

Inuyasha moved and tried to get free. Naraku hit Inuyasha with another tentacle and instead of screaming Inuyasha howled in perfect inu-youkai, _Sesshoumaru help_! No one had been expecting that one. They had no idea why he had howled instead of screamed.

Sesshoumaru had been asleep when he heard Inuyasha howl in perfect inu-youkai he couldn't believe he needed help. He looked toward the camp and saw the distress signal and took off running for his little brother's camp.

Inuyasha knew that as soon as he howled his brother had woken up. So he held his hands out in front of him and concentrated and everyone saw the white light concentrating in his hands. No one not even Naraku knew what was going on. All he knew was he had to stop Inuyasha before he released what ever it was he was doing. Just as Inuyasha threw the ball into the air Naraku screamed his name and Inuyasha looked down at him. Naraku sent one of his tentacles at him and then the forest was filled with nothing but Kagome's echoing scream.

Sesshoumaru was just a few miles away when he heard Kagome's scream echo throughout the forest. He knew something bad had happened so he picked up speed and he got to the edge of the clearing just in time to see his brother fall from the tree he had been pinned to and fall to his knees on the ground in front of the tree. He looked dead at Kagome and said something but Sesshoumaru couldn't hear it and neither could Kagome. Inuyasha fell forward on the ground and Naraku laughed so hard he almost let go of Kagome.

Kagome watched as her lover fell to the ground and then leave her alone. She was trapped by Naraku and there was no escape the only thing she felt was sorrow and anger. She wasn't going to let Naraku get away with killing Inuyasha. Kagome looked at Naraku with hatred and extreme pain clearly evident in her eyes.

Kagome yelled, "NARAKU YOU BASTARD! YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT!"

No one knew why she was so mad at Naraku. Even Sesshoumaru didn't know why she was so pissed off till Naraku said it.

Naraku said, "Oh what's the matter Kagome did I take your lover away on your wedding night? If you give me the jewel shards I will let you and your friends go and you can go over to him."

Kagome said, "I will never give you them. And you're the one who will die tonight."

Kagome focused all her energy into her voice and screamed so loud for the only person she knew could make the difference. Her voice echoed throughout the forest as she screamed "Inutaishou" Sesshoumaru and the others were really surprised. But the others were surprised to see that Kagome was purifying Naraku as she screamed and the fact that Naraku was starting to cower under not only the purification power but the name alone. Sesshoumaru was surprised because she screamed for his and Inuyasha's father. He didn't know that she even knew that name. But why she would call someone who was dead was another thing.

Naraku didn't drop her though he just sent another tentacle at her and hit her just above her heart clipping her lung. She quit screaming the name and fell completely silent as she collapsed onto Naraku's tentacle. She had passed out from the injury and from the exertion of power she had just given. Naraku was more afraid that Inutaishou would hear her call and come running to their aid.

Sesshoumaru ran into the clearing and gave Naraku a death stare. He went to move toward him when he heard a ferial howl echo throughout the forest. He knew that howl too and it was his father's howl. He didn't know why he heard his father's howl but he knew that he had to attack Naraku for what he did to his little brother. He had seen Inuyasha die just as he had his mother. They all saw Sesshoumaru charge at Naraku only to be knocked back to where Inuyasha had fallen and be brought to his knees. They all watched as Sesshoumaru was attacked over and over again until he fell forward on the ground as well. He fell right next to Inuyasha they were facing each other staring at each other's life less bodies. Both brothers had been killed by Naraku and the mysterious howl only got worse as well as closer.

Naraku continued to torture Sang and Miroku as well as Kagome. He was continuously attacking them and then the howl came. It was right outside the clearing and it was waiting for a reply from someone. Kagome had heard it calling out to someone anyone to answer him. Kagome knew who it was and so had Sesshoumaru. She was almost going to die and she knew it so she howled in response to the other one saying in almost perfect inu-youkai,_ We need your help. If you are looking for the other two dog demon boys this monster killed them in cold blood. There is no one to help us now. I am not long for this world either not after these attacks I just want my son and my friends to get out of here safely. I have already lost my mate to this asshole and my mate's brother so please if you can help us come fast and fierce. _ That was all she could say before Naraku slammed her into the nearest tree and laughed when she slumped backward toward her friends. They saw the blood running down her forehead and knew that Kagome wouldn't be there much longer.

The mysterious stranger had come into the clearing. He was clad in white same as Sesshoumaru's outfit complete with the armor. They saw that he had pure white hair just like the boys and two tails that resembled Sesshoumaru's own tail. He had the same markings as Inuyasha when he was in his demon form. Sango and Miroku didn't know who it was and neither did Shippou or Naraku and his gang. He stayed where he was and looked around he saw the two boys lying on the ground looking at each other and he saw the blue crescent moon on the half demon's fore head. He looked up toward the demon holding everyone and Sango and the others all saw the crescent moon mark on his forehead.


	4. Chapter 4 The Father Comes Back

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character. I do not own the songs on this fan fiction.

Chapter four: The Father comes back

Kagome started to wake up and when she opened her eyes the only thing she saw was a fuzzy picture of the mysterious stranger. He was looking at the situation and Kagome was trying to focus on the stranger.

He looked on the scene. The boys were gone and all that was left was two demons and three humans. He knew from the smell that the one looking at him trying to focus her eyes was the mate of the half demon he could smell his scent on her and hers on him. His scent was on all of them but the fox demon and the young human girl had it the most.

Naraku had no idea who this person was and really didn't care. He set Kagura on him and she was sent back by his claws. Kagome finally focused her eyes and knew who he was. Kagome got up and turned toward him. She smiled at him and to everyone's surprise he smiled back at her.

Kagome said, "I thought you would hear it and that you would come. You have to get us out of here."

He said, "Did he do all this?"

Kagome said, "Yeah he did."

Shippou was crying and was trying to make sense of everything.

He said, "Ok then don't worry I will get you out of there."

Kagome said, "You have to aim for the spider mark on hi..."

Naraku didn't want her telling him anymore so he slammed her into the ground. No one but the mysterious man and all the demons knew that Kagome was dead. Naraku had smash her into the stone ground and he threw her over to where the boys were.

Shippou sobbed, "Mommy?"

The mysterious stranger was really pissed now he went after Naraku and attacked him head on. He knew what she had been doing and aimed for the spider mark on Naraku's back once he saw. He disposed of Naraku in a short while. Kagura took off and fled for her life.

Shippou went over to Kagome and Inuyasha who were lying right next to each other after Naraku threw Kagome over to Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru. He just started to cry and Sango went to go over there but the mysterious stranger got there first. He picked Shippou up and did exactly as Inuyasha would have done. He held Shippou in his arms and let a low growl come into his chest and Shippou calmed down considerably.

He said, "Don't worry alright I will fix it."

He put Shippou down on the ground and went over to Sesshoumaru. He grabbed Tenseiga then moved where he could get all three in one swipe and he used Tenseiga to bring them back. They all watched as Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha got up as well as Kagome. Inuyasha just wrapped his arms around Kagome so hard she had to tell him to let her go. Shippou ran over to them and he jumped at Inuyasha who put his arms around him. Sesshoumaru on the other hand was looking at the mysterious stranger who now held Tenseiga.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha looked at him then looked at who he was looking at and the first thing he did was put his family behind him and start to growl. The man thought this display of courage was warranted and he didn't feel bad for it. How could he when the last time he had seen the hanyou was the day he was born.

He handed Tenseiga to Sesshoumaru and said, "I think this is yours."

Sesshoumaru took Tenseiga and said, "Thank you."

He turned to Inuyasha and handed him Tetsusaiga and said, "And I think this one belongs to you."

Inuyasha knew this man was a full demon so why was he able to hold his Tetsusaiga but he took it from him without a thank you at all. He was still growling at him as well.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha calm down alright he won't hurt your family."

Inuyasha did as Sesshoumaru had said and calmed down but he still didn't like this man. Inuyasha sniffed toward him and he knew that smell but couldn't place it in anyway.

Sesshoumaru said, "Why are you here anyway?"

He said, "You don't sound happy to see me Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru said, "I will get to that once you tell me why you are here when you are dead?"

Inuyasha looked between Sesshoumaru and the man but couldn't place anything that to him looked familiar to him.

He said, "I am here because I was called here. I came because you and your brother needed help."

Sesshoumaru said, "Well we don't need you so go back to Hell where you belong."

Kagome said, "Sesshoumaru?"

He looked at her and said, "You never should have called him here Kagome. He didn't need to be disturbed."

The mysterious man said, "Sesshoumaru I don't mind alright. I would much rather be here then back where I was."

Sesshoumaru said, "That's not the point alright. The point is she never should have called to you for help."

He said, "Sesshoumaru do not perceive me as inferior or weak. Have some respect for your brother's mate or you will deal with me. She did what she thought was right at that time."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yes sir."

They had never heard him submit in the years he had known him and Inuyasha knew that there had to be something to this man if he made Sesshoumaru submit. Inuyasha looked at the man but couldn't place where he saw his face and smelt his smell before.

Inuyasha said, "Ok just who are you by the way?"

Sesshoumaru was going to answer him when the man said, "No one you need to worry about Inuyasha."

The man had turned and was going to leave when Inuyasha looked at Sesshoumaru who mouthed a single word, _Father._ Then looked dead at Inuyasha.

Inuyasha looked back at the man and said, "How could Kagome call you from the dead father?"

The man stopped and didn't turn he said, "Sesshoumaru why did you tell him?"

Sesshoumaru said, "He had a right to know father I am sorry for that but he had a right. He asked you a question that I know he wants answered."

The man said, "You know how she did it so you tell him."

With that the man left them alone. Inuyasha didn't understand why his father didn't want to talk to him. He felt hurt for the first time since Sesshoumaru treated him with hatred. He looked at Sesshoumaru who saw the hurt in Inuyasha's eyes before it was put behind a mask just like his own.

Sesshoumaru said, "She is a miko. Father died the day you were born. He died protecting you and your mother. For that if he is needed by any of his children and someone who loves them enough calls to him. He is able to come back and help them. There is one draw back to that though."

Inuyasha said, "What is that?"

Sesshoumaru said, "He can't go back to being dead until he is killed again. He will be here until he dies again."

Kagome said, "So he gets a second chance than."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah one that he doesn't want."

Sesshoumaru took off toward his camp and Inuyasha wanted to go after his father but he knew he had to stay here and protect his family and friends.

He looked at Kagome and said, "Can you guys go back to Kaede's village? I have to do something and I can't protect you. I will meet you guys there and Kagome you can go home if you want to. I will come and get you when I come back."

They nodded and Kagome went over to him and wrapped her arms around him. She placed her head against his chest.

She whispered, "Tell him I am sorry for disturbing his sleep. I hope you get a second chance to be with him Inuyasha."

They left in the direction of Kaede's village. Inuyasha went into the direction that his father had went. He followed his scent all the way to a grave he knew well. It was his mother's grave and Inuyasha approached him.

He was about an arms length away from him when he stopped.

Inuyasha said, "She loved you a lot. She missed you a lot too."

He said, "Why did you follow me here Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "I wanted to know something that's all."

He said, "Why can't you ask your brother?"

Inuyasha said, "I could ask Sesshoumaru but it wouldn't be the truth. Its something I need to ask you because it concerns you."

He said, "What is it you want to know?"

Inuyasha said, "Do you blame me for your death?"

He said, "No I don't Inuyasha. I never would I wasn't long for this world when I came to protect you in the first place. See that very day I had battled with Ryuukoytsusei and I had sealed him to a mountain side which is probably where he still is. I was injured really badly and I was dying when I left Sesshoumaru to go protect your mother and you."

Inuyasha said, "Actually father Ryuukoytsusei isn't pinned anymore. Naraku let him loose and he had a Jewel shard embedded in his mask."

He said, "So he still lives. I will deal with him later."

Inuyasha said, "Actually I already did same with Menoumaru. I killed them both with Tetsusaiga and my claws. Menoumaru was actually killed with my backlash wave and Kagome's sacred arrow."

He turned to Inuyasha and regarded him with eyes that were bright and wide. He smiled and laughed.

He said, "You did something I couldn't do. I am proud of you Inuyasha but you should be getting back to your family and friends. Do not worry about me I will be fine?"

He turned away from him and was back to looking at Izayoi's grave.

Inuyasha said, "I sent them back to the village and Kagome is going to go home beyond the bone eater's well. So they are going to be fine. I will leave it that's what you really want of me father."

Inutaishou heard the pain in Inuyasha's voice as he said the last part. He knew that Inuyasha just wanted to spend some time with him while he had the chance to do so.

He said, "Why would you want to spend time with me Inuyasha I abandoned you and your mother as well as your brother?"

Inuyasha said, "That wasn't by your choice. You would have stayed with us if you could have. And mom died when I was five and Sesshoumaru has never been nice to me except for today. I think something is wrong with him actually."

Inutaishou said, "No there is nothing wrong with him I think he just realized that he has to protect you now. That's all. You have a family now to protect and he knows that you will be more preoccupied with protecting them to protect yourself from harm."

Inuyasha wanted to just run up and hug his father but knew better than to do that. He had remembered what happened when a prince had done that to his father when he came back from war. He was smacked and pushed aside but Inuyasha didn't think his father would do that to him but he wasn't sure.

Inuyasha said, "Father do you regret protecting us?"

He got up and round on Inuyasha. He grabbed him by his neck and slammed him into a tree.

He said, "I don't regret anything I did. Except that I wasn't there enough for either of you boys especially you Inuyasha."

He let him go and fell to his knees. He wrapped his arms around Inuyasha.

He said, "I am so sorry Inuyasha that I left you alone here. You must hate me for it."

Inuyasha said, "I don't hate you father and you have nothing to be sorry about. If it weren't for you I wouldn't be here right now."

Inutaishou looked up at him and smiled. Inuyasha smiled back at him and wrapped his own arms around his father. He was just happy to finally be able to have his father. After a while they quit hugging and Inuyasha sat on a huge boulder looking at his mother's grave and his father sat below the boulder looking at the sunrise over the horizon. Inuyasha knew that this night was going to be his human night.

Inuyasha said, "I can't stay with you tonight father. I am sorry but I will be back in the morning."

He said, "Why can't you stay tonight?"

Inuyasha wasn't looking at his father but his father was looking at him.

Inuyasha said, "Tonight is the no moon. I don't want to seem weak to you that's all."

Inutaishou said, "Inuyasha just because you are going to be human tonight doesn't make you weak. In fact I think that is a strength because you get a chance to be with both of your heritage."

Inuyasha said, "It's a weakness I hate. Kagome and us are collecting Shikon no tama jewel shards and once its whole I plan on making myself a full fledged demon like Sesshoumaru and you."

Inutaishou said, "Do you hate me for making you a half demon?"

Inuyasha said, "No I don't hate you for that. I couldn't hate you for it ever. Even if I was treated like a mongrel when I was little. I couldn't hate you father. I love you too much to hate you."

Inutaishou said, "I am sorry for the way you were treated Inuyasha if I had never gotten involved with your mother than you wouldn't be a half demon."

Inuyasha said, "Don't alright. Its not your fault. It's the people who threw rocks at me, beat me, and chased me that are to blame. You loved mother and for that I am not mad. I am mad and hate Sesshoumaru for it though. He could have saved me many times but instead me decided to ignore me and to attack me continuously with no remorse for anything or anyone."

Inutaishou looked at his son and smelt the pain coming from him. It broke his heart to smell that coming from his own child. But he didn't press the matter much.

Inutaishou said, "You can stay with me. You will be safe with me I won't let anything hurt you tonight I promise."

Inuyasha said, "If that's what you want father. I will stay with you."

They sat there for the longest time doing nothing and saying nothing. Inuyasha knew that his mother had always loved his singing and he always sang for her when he came to visit to her.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and began to sing,

_I walk a lonely road the only one I have ever known._

_Don't know where it goes but its under me and I walk alone._

_I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams._

_When the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone._

_I walk alone, I walk alone._

_I walk alone, I walk a.._

_My shadows the only one that walks beside me._

_My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating._

_Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me._

_Till then I walk alone._

_Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh._

_I'm walking down the line that divides me somewhere in my mind._

_On the borderline, of the edge, and where I walk alone._

_Read between the lines what's fucked up and everything's alright._

_Check my vital signs and know I'm still alive and I walk alone._

_I walk alone, I walk alone._

_I walk alone, I walk a.._

_My shadows the only one that walks beside me._

_My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating._

_Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me._

_Till then I walk alone._

_Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh._

_I walk alone, I walk a..._

_I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams._

_When the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk a.._

_My shadows the only one that walks beside me._

_My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating._

_Sometimes I wish someone up there will find me._

_Till then I walk alone._

Inuyasha quit singing and Inutaishou was listening to him sing and it felt sad to him. Inuyasha knew that song was his mother's favorite song by far. He knew another one and it was his favorite. He heard it back in Kagome's time once and he liked it a lot.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and began singing,

_Been given 24 hours_

_To tie up loose ends_

_To make amends_

_Her eyes said it all_

_I started to fall_

_And the silence deafened_

_Head spinning round_

_No time to sit down_

_Just wanted to _

_Run and run and run_

_Be careful they say_

_Don't wish life away._

_Now I've one day_

_And I can't believe_

_How I've been wasting my time_

_In 24 hours they'll be_

_Laying flowers_

_On my life, It's over tonight_

_I'm not messing no I_

_Need your blessing_

_And your promise to live free_

_Please do it fir me._

_Is there a heaven a hell_

_And will I come back _

_Who can tell_

_Now I can see_

_What matter to me_

_Its as clear as crystal_

_The places I've been_

_The people I've seen_

_Plans that I made_

_Start to fade_

_The sun's setting gold_

_Thought I would grow old,_

_It wasn't to be_

_And I can't believe _

_How I've been wasting my time._

_In 18 hours they'll be laying flowers_

_On my life, it's over tonight_

_I'm not messing no I_

_Need your blessing_

_And your promise to live free_

_Please do it for me._

_In 13 hours they'll be_

_Laying flowers_

_on my life, it's over tonight_

_I'm not messing no I_

_Need your blessing_

_And your promise to live free_

_Please so it for me_

_I'm not alone, I sense it, sense it_

_All that I said, I meant it, I meant it_

_And I can't believe _

_How much I've wasted my time_

_In just 8 hours they'll be _

_Laying flowers _

_On my life, it's over tonight_

_I'm not messing no I_

_Need your blessing_

_And your promise to live free_

_Please do it for me_

_In just 1 hour they'll be_

_Laying flowers_

_On my life, It's over tonight_

_I'm not messing no I_

_Need your blessing_

_And your promise to live free_

_Please do it for me._

Inutaishou had heard Inuyasha singing another song and the sun was going down over the horizon behind them. Inuyasha knew that the transformation was starting and he was fine sitting up on the boulder but when his ears started to move he screamed and fell backward off the boulder. His father got up and jumped over the boulder to help his son. He saw Inuyasha lying on the ground. He was grabbing his head and Inutaishou had no idea what was wrong all he knew is that his son needed him. So he knelt down and picked Inuyasha up in his arms and let out a really low growl that did nothing to help him.

Kagome was on her way back with the others when she remembered that it was the night of the new moon that night. She had to get back to Inuyasha who she knew would be freaking out later that night.

She said, "Sango I need to borrow Kirara. I have to go back to Inuyasha."

Sango said, "Why he should be fine he's with his father?"

Kagome said, "It's the night of the no moon. His father won't know what's going on and if I know Inuyasha he will take off on his father and go to be by himself. I have to find him before something bad happens to him."

Sango let Kagome take Kirara to go find Inuyasha. She left Shippou with them because she didn't want him to get lost or hurt either. She couldn't protect them both and stay safe herself. She went off toward where they had left Inuyasha and Kirara picked up his scent on the wind. Kagome saw the sun go down behind the horizon and she feared they wouldn't find Inuyasha on time. Then they spotted him in the clearing with his father. She saw him grabbed his head and fall from the bolder he was sitting on and she could hear his screams. His father was trying to comfort him but he didn't know how.

Inutaishou was trying to comfort Inuyasha as best he could but it wasn't working then out of nowhere the young woman that had summoned him came to his aid. She knelt down next to them and Inutaishou gave him to her. He watched as she held him tightly and rocked him back and forth in her arms humming. She looked like his mother for a moment and then out of nowhere Inuyasha turned into her chest and started to cry. Kagome knew why but his father didn't know why his son was crying.

Kagome ran her fingers through his now black hair saying, "Its alright Inuyasha I am right here. I'm not going anywhere. I am so sorry for leaving you tonight of all nights. I forgot tonight was your human night."

Inuyasha sobbed, "Its alright Kagome I asked you to go I wasn't going to stay with my father either but he insisted I stay."

He looked at his father who looked hurt a little bit and he went to go over to him but saw the look in his father's eyes and knew better than to go over to him. He saw the same hatred that he had seen in Sesshoumaru's eyes the one time he had allowed his brother to see him change into a human. He stayed with Kagome. He couldn't believe his own father hated him in his human form. He looked at the ground and let silent tears fall from his eyes. He thought _My own father doesn't even want me anymore. What did I do to deserve him to hate me? He said he was sorry for leaving me and now he hates me. I wish I had my journal back so I could write in it again. I just wish I knew where it was. I wonder who has it and what they are doing with it at this moment._

Sesshoumaru was sitting in a tree just above his camp while the others were sleeping. He reached into his kimono and pulled Inuyasha's journal out and opened it to where he had left off at.

Sesshoumaru read:

Well I found out about my brother. He is still in father's castle but he has changed. He has become cold to everyone around him. Not even father's old friends know why this change has occurred in my brother. One very old friend named Ruu said that it happened right after he found out I was pinned to the tree by Kikyo. He was in the middle of a battle with the cat demons and I wasn't there to help him. I think he resents me for either leaving him alone or for not helping him defeat the cat demons. Father defeated their leader a long time ago and they came back for revenge I guess. I heard Sesshoumaru and his army sent those damn felines running back home with their tails between their legs and their fur standing on end. I just hope that once my brother finds out that I am alive and well then he will be as he once was but there is really no guarantee that this will happen. He may hate me more than he did before. I know that my brother hates me for being a half demon everyone does. Even Kikyo hated me as a half demon. I realize that now. She would never touch me in any way while I was a half demon on when I was human. Then she loved me and would take walks with me under the stars. There was never a moon for us to walk under because I am only human one time of month and that is when the moon is no more. I always wanted someone to help me on those nights. It is very painful when my hanyou ears slid down to where the human ones are. I am scared when my sight, hearing, and smell go to that of a human because I can't defend myself as I can in my half demon form and I can not protect the ones that I love or that I consider my friends.

Kagome and me are going to go look for the jewel shards since she shattered it by accident. I yelled at her for it but I know she didn't mean to. I can't let her know that I didn't mean to yell at her because I don't really know how to say I am sorry to a girl. In fact I am kind of shy around her. The only girl I have ever talked to was Kikyo and she died and left me alone. So now I have to get used to having Kagome around me all the time. She often goes home. She lived beyond the bone eaters well. If you jump into the well you are enveloped in blue light and then when you land on the bottom and you look up you have a roof over your head. That is her side of the well which is a thousand years into the future. Its weird there are no demons in her time. Everyone there is human not even my brother lives there. I don't know what happened to all the demons but she said that she would find out for me because I asked her what happened to them and she said she didn't know but she would find out someway or another.


	5. Chapter 5 Kagome Loses it

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character. I do not own the songs on this fan fiction.

Chapter Five: Kagome loses it.

Well I am in Kagome's time today. I am sitting in my favorite tree at this moment. She is sleeping in her room just a little way from me. I can see her in her bed. She is tossing and turning I guess she is having a nightmare she usually is about this time of night. Mostly I think its about when her father died. She won't talk about it but from what her mother says her father and Kagome were pretty close. So I guess it was like Sesshoumaru and my father they were close too I think. I guess that he took that hard as well and to have only a halfbreed sibling to confide in it was difficult to talk about it. I try to get her to talk about it but she won't talk to me about it. I have only one thing in this world to hang onto anymore and that is Kagome and her family. Her little brother looks up to me as a hero just as I do my own big brother. He actually loves me as much as his mother loves me. I don't know how Kagome feels about me but I know how I feel about her. I love her. I know that its stupid to say that after the last time I got involved with a priestess but I can't help it. She is so nice to me at times and is always worried about me. The only person to cry for me was my mother but she isn't the only one anymore. Kagome shed tears for me once and I was amazed by it. I can't believe that she of all people would shed tears for me especially when nothing made her.

We were fighting a spider demon and it was the night of the no moon and that is the night I loose my demon powers. It's the night I become human and vulnerable to everything a human is. Well I changed after being encased in spider web and when I pulled the spider web off my head I had black hair instead of my white hair. We had gotten shippou by then. I will get into that later. Well when I went back in there my Tetsusaiga wouldn't transform for me either so I knew that it was just my bare hands. Well I was fighting the demon trying to keep Kagome safe. I got stuck in the spider web and the spider demon took advantage of it he bite me and injected his poison into my body. I was human and all alone. I could barely understand what was happening when Kagome climbed up the spider web and she was right in front of me when I focused my eyes on her and I saw she was crying. She was actually crying for me. No one had ever cried for me other than my own mother and then only once in front of me and that was when I asked her what a halfbreed was. Kagome got me down from the spider web and protected me from harm. She helped to get me into another room where Myouga sucked the poison from my blood but anything other than that was up to me. Kagome sat next to me on the floor as I sat there. I must have laid down because I remember telling her that she smelled nice. She blushed a lot that night. I fell asleep with my head resting on her lap that was the only night I ever fell asleep with my head on her lap or even close enough to her to even fell comfortable. The spider demon was right outside the door. The whole night I was in and out of consciousness and when I awoke the next morning Kagome was sitting with her back to the wall with me lying with my head on her lap. I had turned back into my half demon self and I was strong enough to fight. I never forgot that she cried for me that one time. I didn't know she cared about me that much. Well I better go in and lay down next to her before she falls off the bed again. I have to keep her safe from harm. I will consult Kami again for both Kagome, Shippou, Sesshoumaru, Kashu, Jin - chan, Souta, Father and mother even though they are no longer with us. I hope that I will see father just once so I can know what he was like. I have no memories of my father. He died the night I was born. Mother said he died protecting us from harm. I am great ful to father for that and I love him as much as a son can love someone they have never met. I will also ask Kami to watch out for Kaede and Kikyo as well. It wasn't Kikyo's fault that all this happened it is Naraku's fault and he will pay for what he did to me and to her.

Sesshoumaru had noticed that Inuyasha prayed a lot to Kami. He relied to much on the human faith and not enough on his own beliefs. He also noticed that he was on his list of ones he would pray for all the time. He was a constant member of that special and growing list of people. Sesshoumaru turned the page and saw that the writing had changed again and knew that his brother had skipped some times in his life. It was sad to think that his brother wouldn't share those times with anyone not even himself. Sesshoumaru looked down at his Rin and Jaken and saw they were still asleep. So he read on:

Well I know now not to underestimate the power of Kagome. She can be very persuasive at times. I can get anything I want from her practically. I know that it is wrong for me to take advantage of her sometimes. I know that there is another person I should talk to before I leave Kagome alone in her time. I just have to go somewhere for a moment. I want to go see father's castle. I found it yesterday while I was running through the city to get to Kagome's school. I have to wear a hat on my head to hid my ears but its better than having to stay locked up inside her house all day. Well I am going to leave for now when I start writing again I will be at father's castle.

Well I have looked all over this castle there is nothing here. I mean nothing its completely bare. Its got nothing that Sesshoumaru has here. All the paintings and all of the furniture and everything is gone. The castle is completely bare as far as having anything in it. I went to every room and there is only one room left un touched and that's the room I am in right now. It is my old room. It was locked but I know where Sesshoumaru hid the key to my room so I went and got it and went inside. The Castle looks really bad right now. It doesn't feel like home anymore. I wonder where they took everything. I think I will ask Kagome in the morning when she wakes up. I am going to stay here for a while longer than I am going to lock it back up and go back to her house. I really wonder what happened to my brother? He would never leave father's castle this way. I wonder if there is anything left in the Library. I think I will go and check.

Well there is nothing left in the library either except a single book which I guess was too heavy for them to move. It's the family book. I looked through it everyone is mentioned there but me and my mother. I guess we weren't really wanted by anyone but that's alright. I am sure everything will be alright soon. Well I have to go back to Kagome's house its almost dawn and she will be awake later. Today is Saturday and we are going to this place called a museum she said that I would like it there. Its got a lot of things form my era there. She said they just opened a new exhibit on my era so she wants to go see what it there. I am going so I don't feel left out she wanted me to go so some guy at school will leave her alone.

Sesshoumaru wonder himself where everything had went out of his castle now Inuyasha's castle. So he read on:

Well we went to the museum today. There was everything I had thought lost from my families castle. The curator noticed that I resembled and had the same name as the half demon in one of the paintings that hung in his gallery. I never knew Sesshoumaru had a painting commissioned of me at all. I guess I don't know my brother as much as I thought I did. I know one thing I loved the painting. I stared at it for hours. I didn't remember it being done but by the painting it had to be old because I was standing next to Sesshoumaru and he had his arms around me. He was smiling too and he doesn't smile anymore. In fact he doesn't act that way with me anymore either. So I know it is an old painting.

I just wanted to take everything back to the castle where it belonged. They had invaded my families home and taken everything from it. I wanted to ask them why they had done that when I noticed something. It was donated by someone in my family but it wasn't Sesshoumaru it was someone else in our family. I asked to talk with the person who donated all this stuff to the museum and the curator said that it was impossible because the person didn't just see anyone. Kagome was across the room from me and I told him that I wanted to know about the people in the painting and who better than to ask than the person who is related to them. He agreed with me and I am to have a meeting with him Monday while Kagome is at school. That way she wont know where I am. We are going to meet in a restaurant and have lunch. I don't know all I know is that I am going to meet someone from our family in this time period. I wonder who he is related to me or Sesshoumaru?

Sesshoumaru was just as anxious as Inuyasha must have been. He wanted to know who this person was and why he was doing what he did. He also wanted to know who sired his family line himself or his brother. Sesshoumaru turned the page and read on:

Well I went to the restaurant and I went to the lady in the front who Kagome had called a hostess once while we were here. I told her I was there to see Mr.

Takahashi and she took me to his table. He was sitting there waiting for me to show up. I had to look twice because I saw Sesshoumaru looking back at me from the chair. The hostess left and He said, "So you must be Inuyasha. The curator told me that you resembled the painting but I didn't know you resembled it this much. You and I could be those two in the picture for all we know. Sorry I am ranting. What is it you would like to know about those two you saw in the painting?" I looked at him for a while then said, "I am sorry but you do look like the one in the picture. Do you have his name as well?" He said, "Yeah I do actually but nothing else is really known about my family. All I know is that I am named after the ancestor that started my family. So that's all I really know." I sat there for a while longer before I said, "Do you know what happened to them? Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru I mean." And the man just looked at me. He said, "Why would you want to know that?" I said, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you." He said, "I do know but I would like to hear why you want to know and why you think I wouldn't believe you." So I said, "I will tell you when there is not so many prying ears and eyes to hear and see this conversation." He said, "Alright so long as you tell me." He actually sounds like Sesshoumaru with the cold stoic voice of his even right down to the white hair and the moon mark on his head the only difference is its not as bright as Sesshoumaru's mark.

I know that I shouldn't get jealous of Sesshoumaru but I do. He saw and talked to father before he died and on top of that he is Lord and has the family crest. I don't know why I don't have the crest as well I mean I am part of the family too. I wonder if it only shows up on the pure blooded family members. Well anyway back to what I was saying.

He said, "There isn't much known about Inuyasha actually other than that his brother was there when he died. No one knows how he died and I have been searching for a long time to know that." I said, "How did Sesshoumaru die then?" I just wanted to know so that maybe I could stop it from happening. I know it happened after I died but if I could know it then I could tell him and he wouldn't get hurt. I don't know if he will even listen to me or if he will even want to know. The man said, "Well not much is known about that either. We do know that he died after Inuyasha and after he had his heir. It was a half demon that he named after his brother. Its said that he felt guilty because Inuyasha was killed. He didn't just die though. He was killed by someone who know when he was human. All that we know is what is written in Sesshoumaru's own journal but the weird thing is if you look at the first half of the journal is written by Inuyasha while the other half is by Sesshoumaru. Its like they wrote in the same book at some point. In there is a semi detailed account on how Inuyasha left this world but that is all there is. In fact there is no record of him ever being born. Most of the demons in their family half or other wise there is a record is like no one wanted anyone to know he existed. In fact the painting in the museum is the only known painting ever done of Inuyasha. It was found in the Library behind a book case in a secret room where Sesshoumaru used to go to be alone. In there we found everything

that belonged to Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru when they were little. Inuyasha's sword was in there as well and his haori. I guess Sesshoumaru wanted to keep his brother near him even after he lost him."

I sat there for a while contemplating what this man was saying. My brother doesn't have a soft side as far as I know. I think I will pay a visit to my brother's castle one of these days when he isn't there and see what I can find out. I said, "So what did Sesshoumaru write about Inuyasha's death?" Mr. Takahashi said, "Well he wrote that he missed him terribly and that his life hadn't been the same since Inuyasha died. Rin had died shortly after Inuyasha and Jaken had been killed in the war between the demons and the humans. That was the war that wiped out the majority of the demon population. Sesshoumaru and a select few were spared because they were not bested in battle. The wolf demons were the first to fall to the human race then the neko demon's then the others. Sesshoumaru also wrote that Inuyasha had been with his mate at the time it happened. His mate was a human miko that is all that is known about his mate. There is never a name just the reference of a miko that is all. No one really knows who this miko is though."

I knew though. The miko was Kagome. He always call's her miko when they meet. I don't know maybe I am only hoping it is Kagome because I guess I love her but I could never tell her that though she would only laugh in my face. So I said, "Did he say anything else?" Mr. Takahashi said, "Well actually he did. Sesshoumaru wrote that Inuyasha had been murdered. He had been in his room in the castle when it happened. He was attacked while he slept in his bed with his mate. Inuyasha was stabbed a lot of times. It happened on the night of the new moon we know that because Inuyasha wrote that he was human on that night so that is how he died. Sesshoumaru wrote that Inuyasha's last words were his killers name. He said it was someone named "Naraku" who ever that is. There is never a mention of him in the history books anywhere. He is mentioned throughout the journal though."

I never told Sesshoumaru Takahashi who I was. But I know that because he finds this journal he will know though. I am the real Inuyasha Mr. Takahashi and I want to Thank you for allowing me to talk with you. And you are just like my older brother Sesshoumaru. I am glad I was able to talk to you and I am really sorry. I wanted to know how Sesshoumaru and I died so that I might be able to stop it from happening. I know that it will make no difference in the end but I must try.

Oh and Mr. Takahashi Naraku is a half demon like myself. He murdered my first love Kikyo for the shikon no tama. He made us think the other had betrayed us. Kikyo thinking it was I who attacked her shot one of her sacred arrows at me and pinned me to the sacred tree in Kagome Higurashi's shrine which used to be the middle of the Inuyasha forest. I will not tell you how I was freed for you do not need to know but know this. I am very much alive and that I am glad to have met my brother's heir.

Sesshoumaru looked up from the book and knew exactly how his little brother died. He wasn't going to let that stop him from protecting him. He was going to kill Naraku before that happened.

The next morning Kagome went back with Kirara to Kaede's village. Inuyasha was the only one awake at that moment for his father was still asleep. Inuyasha went through the motions of his usual day. unaware to even him Sesshoumaru was watching from a near by tree. Inuyasha went through the motions of his usual day starting with his normal morning ritual even when he is in Kagome's time he does him morning exercises. Sesshoumaru saw Inuyasha take both his fire rat robe and his white kimono off to stretch his muscles. Sesshoumaru had never known that Inuyasha was actually stronger than he looked. He started by dropping forward on the ground and doing Pushups. This all intrigued Sesshoumaru and even Inutaishou as he watched his youngest son doing something that he himself had never needed to do. Inuyasha went from doing pushups to doing sit ups. Inuyasha continued to do this until his arms wouldn't hold him anymore as well as sweating badly. Inuyasha then stood up and went through his normal fighting exercises. Neither of them had ever seen this before. Inuyasha was doing it by himself this morning because he wanted Kagome to go home for a while. He normally did the Karate motions with Kagome. It was all very hard to do alone.

Sesshoumaru had gotten down from the tree and was standing next to his father when Inuyasha finally noticed he was being watched. He stopped and looked at them with curiosity plainly visible in his eyes. Inuyasha thought _I wonder. Can I beat Sesshoumaru this way? Even just once. Maybe I will see if he wants to spar with me. I mean I am not as good as Kagome is but hell its worth a try. He doesn't even know how to do most of these things._ Inuyasha walked over to them and grabbed the water bottle that Kagome had left with him and drank deeply from it. When he was done he looked at both his father and his older brother who were both watching him.

Inuyasha said, "So how long have you two been watching me?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I have been watching since Kagome left."

Inutaishou said, "I have been watching since you started to do the first exercise you did."

Inuyasha said, "Those are called pushups in Kagome's era and the second one is called sit ups and the third one I was doing is called Karate. They are all from her era not this one. I use them because it is fun and it's a good work out so what ever."

Sesshoumaru said, "So who do you normally spar with? I know you spar with someone because of the way you were dodging invisible attacks."

Inuyasha said, "I normally spar with Kagome and I normally end up on my backside when we are done. She is so much better at it then I am."

Sesshoumaru said, "Oh ok."

Inuyasha said, "I had an idea. Do you want to spar with me Sesshoumaru? It might be fun to see who would win."

Sesshoumaru said, "Alright sounds like fun."

They both had their Kimono's off and they each took a respectable stance. Inuyasha had taken a crouching stance, the monkey, while Sesshoumaru took a standing stance, crane. They both attacked each other and blow after blow Inuyasha hit Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru couldn't land a single hit on Inuyasha. In the end Sesshoumaru ended up on his back side looking ashamed. Inuyasha was chuckling to himself because he had just bested his older brother in something.

After a while Sesshoumaru went back to his castle with Rin and Jaken. Sesshoumaru had no idea that his father had treated Inuyasha with anything but what he had seen. He thought his father was doing a great job of showing Inuyasha exactly what he was missing. Sesshoumaru had no idea that his father had treated Inuyasha exactly like Kikyo used to when he was a half demon.

Sesshoumaru after getting to the castle decided that he would go to his library and read some more about his brother from inside the journal. So when he got to the castle with his family he went into the Library and said he didn't want to be disturbed. He sat behind his oak desk and opened his brother's journal to where he had left off at.

Well now that I know how I and my brother will die I know exactly what I have to do. I have to get Sesshoumaru to allow me to stay with him. I only hope that a truce will be enough to get over all the years we have fought. I only hope he will accept my truce because I am tired of fighting with him. I never wanted to fight with him at all. I only fought him because I had to protect Kagome from him. I never wanted to fight with him and I know that he will never really know that I hate to fight with him that is why I never try to harm him in any way although he tries to kill me. I guess that me being a halfbreed does hurt his pride even just a little bit.

I wonder what my father was like. I never knew my father at all. I know he died when I was born but that is all I know. I never got a chance to ask Sesshoumaru about him. He talked to father before he died. I think he is lucky to have even known father. I would love to get a chance to just sit and talk with him just once in my life time. Mother used to tell me I looked like him when I was little. I wonder what she would say now.

Sesshoumaru noticed that everything in the next paragraph was all smudged and sloppy. He knew that from the fact that a lot of them looked like drops of water. He knew that Inuyasha had been crying while he wrote the next part. And to Sesshoumaru to know that even for a moment that Inuyasha had been crying and he wasn't there to sooth him made him angry with himself. Sesshoumaru continued to read.

I miss my mother so much. I never even got to say goodbye to her. Kagome says that the dead can hear us even if they are not with us anymore. So

I walked away from every one else and I am sitting on a hill far from camp at the moment. I can see the light from the fire from where I am right now as well as the fire from my brother's camp. I just want to run down to Sesshoumaru and curl up in his arms for the rest of the night but I know that I can not ever do that again. He will never allow me to do that again in this life time or the next. I said my goodbyes to mother and father. Kikyo has arrived and I must talk to her. I will write what happens when I tell her I have to say goodbye to her.

I told Kikyo that I could not go to Hell with her like I had said I would. I told her I was sorry but I could not abandon Kagome or my son. I will not leave them here alone at any point. She said that I was making a grave mistake in choosing her reincarnation over her but I do not think she will try anything and if she does then I will send her back to hell where she belongs. She never loved me like I loved her. When I was half demon she never touched me in anyway. But when I was human she would kiss me and hold my hand as we walked. Kagome holds my hand sometimes while I am a half demon. She isn't afraid of my demon side either. If I turn she walks right up to me and puts her arms around me and begs me to turn back to my hanyou state. I never harm her when I am like this I know that she is a weakness that I appreciate.

Naraku knows how I feel about Kagome just like he knew how I felt about Kikyo. He played me for a fool and he will not do that again. I vow to this here in this journal of mine. That I will never allow anything to happen to Kagome, my son, Sango, Miroku, or Sesshoumaru and his group. I will never allow Naraku to harm them in anyway. I will not loose them to him any of them. I know that Rin is good for Sesshoumaru the last time I saw him he looked almost happy to have her with him.

Sesshoumaru didn't know I was there or he would have kept his mask on like he does any other time I am around. He had let his mask fall and I actually saw my older brother smiling as he played with Rin in the field of wild flowers not far from here. It made me happy to see that smile because I had not seen a smile on his face since before I was sent away with my mother. That day was the last day I saw a smile on his face even when I saw him by himself I never saw a smile grace his face not once. It pained me to see such a sad look on his face but since he has Rin to make him smile I will not have to try so hard to get him to listen to me later.

Sesshoumaru quit reading and knew that his brother had seen him the one time when he had let his mask down long enough to enjoy playing with Rin in those flowers. He remembered the day vividly and knew that Rin did as well. Jaken had been away or he would never had allowed her to sway him into playing a game with her. He thought _I really must take Rin out to play alone with me again. I must also goat Inuyasha into following me once and then I will show him a smile he hasn't seen in a while._

Inuyasha wondered why his father didn't want to spend anymore time with him but he decided that it was best to just go home. He had told his father that he would be in a village in the

western lands not far from the bone eaters well. If he wasn't there then he was beyond the well in Kagome's time. He left his father to go and be with his loving family. He knew that at least there he was wanted.

Inuyasha arrived at Kaede's village and was greeted by Shippou jumping into his arms with the phrase Daddy coming from his mouth. Everyone knw Shippou was going to be cloobered for what he had just said but to everyones's surprise including the few villagers who had heard Shippou yell Daddy toward Inuyasha. Inuyasha held shippou out in front of him and smiled.

Inuyasha said, "Shippou why did you call me that?"

Shippou said, "Cause that is who you are. You are my daddy. Just as Kagome is my mommy."

That would have made Kagome blush had she been there to hear Shippou.

Inuyasha said, "And why am I your daddy? Did you not have one already?"

Shippou said, "Yeah I had one you know that Inuyasha. You are my new daddy."

Inuyasha was flattered that Shippou wanted him as his father. He was never any good at anything and his father was worse yet. He vowed if Shippou wanted him as his father he would do better than his father had with him.

Inuyasha said, "Do you really want me as your father Shippou? Will it make you happy?"

Shippou looked at Inuyasha as did everyone else some of them with awe.

Shippou said, "Yeah I do Inuyasha. It will make me happy because that is how I have seen you for a long time."

Inuyasha said, "Ok then you can call me that to your little hearts content."

Shippou said, "Really Inuyasha I can call you that any time I like?"

Inuyasha said, "Yeah you can."

Shippou was so happy with himself because he finally got exactly what he wanted all alone another father in his life time. Inuyasha went into the hut with Shippou in his arms and sat down in the corner. He was thinking about going to go and see Kagome but he couldn't just up and leave his son there all alone like his father had done to him and Sesshoumaru. The others had come into the hut and were all sitting around the fire pit talking when Inuyasha looked at Shippou who was over playing with Kirara.

He said, "Hey Shippou do you want to go with me?"

Shippou said, "Where are you going daddy?"

He said, "I am going beyond the well where else. Do you want to go with me?"

Shippou said, "Yeah but can I get there?"

Everyone was looking at him with awe because they knew that only Kagome and Inuyasha could get through the well.

Inuyasha said, "Never know unless we try now will we."

He walked out of the hut with Shippou in tow behind him. He picked Shippou up and they went to the well where they were going to go to Kagome's time period. Inuyasha jumped into the well with Shippou in his arms and the blue light enveloped them and when they landed on the bottom of the well they were in Kagome's time. Shippou found that it smelled differently now and it looked differently as well. But Shippou found that the god tree was still there. He looked at Inuyasha and smiled.

Shippou said, "Daddy is that the same tree you were pinned to back home?"

Inuyasha said, "Yeah it is Shippou. Kagome lives in the center of Inuyasha forest. It is kind of cool huh?"

Shippou said, "Actually its scary to know that this is what our world will look like later. There is no forest or any demons like me or you here."

Inuyasha walked toward the house and he heard someone yell out Inuyasha. Then he was hit hard in the stomach by a little boy. Inuyasha smiled and hugged Souta back and smiled.

Souta said, "Inuyasha you came. Kagome said you wouldn't be here for a while."

Inuyasha said, "Yeah I came Souta. Is Kagome here right now?"

Souta said, "No she is out with Hojo right now. Yuka set it up so she couldn't get out of it."

Souta noticed the little child with Inuyasha and saw that he was hiding behind him shaking.

Souta said, "Inuyasha who is that?"

Inuyasha said, "Oh Souta this is Shippou. He is mine and Kagome's son. We adopted him. Shippou this is Souta your mother's little brother."

Shippou said, "Will he hurt me?"

Inuyasha said, "No he won't or he would have to answer to me and Kagome. He wouldn't want to run into his sister."

Shippou went out and bowed to Souta who bowed back then looked at him and left. Inuyasha picked up Shippou and walked into the house where he could smell food cooking. He walked into the Kitchen and placed Shippou on the counter and walked up behind the older woman making the food.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and said, "Good after noon Mother."

She turned and saw Inuyasha and hugged him tightly.

She said, "Good afternoon Inuyasha."

Kashu noticed Shippou and said, "Well who is this adorable little one?"

Inuyasha said, "This is Shippou he is Kagome's and mine."

She noticed that he wasn't a half demon and had remembered her daughter talking about him so she went over to him and picked him up and hugged him.

Shippou said, "Daddy who is this?"

Inuyasha said, "She is Kagome's mother."

Kashu said, "I guess that would make me your grandmother."

Jin-chan came into the Kitchen and said, "That would make you who's grandmother my dear?"

Kashu said, "Father this is Kagome and Inuyasha's son Shippou."

Shippou looked at this old man and scrambled out of Kashu's arms and right into Inuyasha's arms. He was terrified to see such an old man and not know if he was harmless or not.

Jin-chan saw the fox demon and said, "It is a pleasure to meet you Shippou. You are not in any danger so don't be afraid."

Inuyasha said, "Jin-chan is Kagome's grandfather Shippou. He will not harm you anymore than he would harm me or Kagome."

Shippou got up the nerve to walk over to him and sniff him then upon finding Kagome's scent he calmed down considerably. That alone comforted him enough to know that he was not going to harm him in anyway.

Inuyasha was going to put Shippou to bed then decided to bring Shippou with him. He was going to go and retrieve Kagome from the mall that she was at with Hojo. He went to the mall with his ears hidden under a black bandana. He was dressed in a tight t-shirt, tight blue jeans, leather boots, and leather jacket. Shippou was dressed in modern day children's clothing. He had bought the cloths on his way to the mall. Inuyasha saw Kagome and her friends all sitting near the wishing fountain in the center of the mall. He went over there with Shippou and he heard her friends talking about them. He smiled a little bit and laughed as well.

Inuyasha said, "Kagome."

They all looked at her because she wasn't paying attention in the least. They saw that she was talking to Hojo and wasn't paying attention to the mysteriously handsome man.

Inuyasha said, "Shippou do you want to go and surprise your mommy?"

Shippou said, "Yeah daddy."

Inuyasha let go of Shippou's hand as he ran across the distance between Inuyasha and Kagome. He was calling Mommy the whole way. Kagome still wasn't paying attention until she was almost knocked into the fountain by an orange blur.

Kagome said, "Shippou what are you doing here? How did you get here anyway?"

Inuyasha walked over there and said, "I brought him with me that's how."

Kagome looked and smiled at Inuyasha.

Shippou said, "Mommy guess what?"

All the others thought he was kidding until Kagome answered him.

Kagome said, "What sweetheart?"

Shippou said, "Inuyasha said I could call him daddy all I want. He didn't mind me calling him that."

Inuyasha said, "That's because as far as I am concerned you are my son alright. I have thought that for along time."

Kagome said, "That is wonderful Shippou. So what brought you here Inuyasha? You could have waited for me at home. Why come all the way out here?"

Inuyasha said, "Have you forgotten that you are not single anymore Kagome?"

Kagome smiled and blushed. Her friends had asked her about the ring and she had lied to them saying it was nothing.

Kagome said, "No I haven't forgotten but I am only out with my friends. What harm is there in that?"

Inuyasha turned to her friends and said, "There is no harm in that. I want you three to listen to me. Kagome is not single anymore. She is mine so I would greatly appreciate you not setting her up with anyone anymore."

Yuka said, "You don't own her. She can still dump your sorry ass anytime she likes just because she has this kid means nothing anyone will want her."

Kagome said, "Actually I can't dump him Yuka."

Yuka said, "Yes you can in fact I think you can do better than this wanna be gang member. Hojo is so much more your type then this guy."

Kagome got up and got in Yuka's face. This was something Kagome very rarely did to anyone. So when she did it she ment business.

Kagome said, "I would watch what you say about my mate you self centered egoistical bitch. He is so much better than anyone you ever set me up with the exception of Hojo. Although he isn't much better. In fact with as much as Inuyasha and I go through Hojo and every other guy you set me up with would run with their tails between their legs. Inuyasha at least protects me when the time comes and I do the same for him so back off or I will make you regret saying anything about him."

They all looked at her weird because she had used the word mate which was something only a dog or an animal would refer to their life partner as. Inuyasha if his ears had been out they would be back against his head. He had backed away from her a little bit and she turned full circle and planted a kiss right on Inuyasha's lips like it was nothing. Shippou blushed and hid his face behind his hands and laughed. Inuyasha was caught off guard so he didn't do much at first but then after a little while his arms went around her waist and he kissed her back. Everyone else looked at them in awe and wonderment at what she ment by mate.

Yuka said, "Kagome what did you mean by the word mate? You are not a dog why would you say that word?"

Kagome said, "Mate as in Husband. I chose that word because I wanted to now if you will excuse me. My family and I are going to take our leave of you four."


	6. Chapter 6 Sesshoumaru is in Big trouble

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character.

Chapter Six: Sesshoumaru is in big trouble.

Kagome and Inuyasha left with Shippou right behind them. He stayed with them for a long time then stopped at a store that had nothing but candy in it. Kagome and Inuyasha hadn't noticed he wasn't behind them until Kagome turned and noticed he wasn't there.

Kagome said, "Inuyasha where is Shippou?"

Inuyasha looked around him and said, "I don't know. Don't worry we will find him he couldn't have gotten far."

They back tracked to where Inuyasha picked up his scent and found that he went into a candy store. Kagome went over to him and wrapped her arms around him.

Kagome pulled away from him and said, "Don't you ever do that again. You had me and your father worried sick."

Shippou had never seen Kagome mad especially at him. It scared him to know that he could get Kagome so mad at him when all he did was walk into the shop full of candy.

Inuyasha said, "Kagome its alright. I did find him so he is fine. All he did was find a store full of all kinds of poky nothing more. You can't really blame him I mean he is just a child after all."

Kagome said, "I know that but it doesn't mean that gives him the right to run off like he did. Its not as safe here as you think Inuyasha."

Then as if on cue to prove her point a woman screamed out her child's name and everyone was searching for a younger little girl who had also been found missing. Kagome felt bad for her mother and looked at Inuyasha.

She took Inuyasha's hand and went over to her with their own little boy following closely behind them. Kagome was talking to the woman while Inuyasha sniffed around trying to catch the girl's scent. When he did then he left Shippou with Kagome and the other woman and went to get the child.

He found her talking to an older man. Inuyasha didn't like the looks of it though. He went over to them.

Inuyasha said, "Emily your mom is worried about you."

Emily looked at him and saw the man. She didn't know him but if he knew her name then he couldn't be all that bad.

The man said, "How do I know that you won't take her from the mall yourself?"

Inuyasha said, "I am not the one who has her hand now am I. I also know that you are not her father. So Emily come on lets get you back to your mother."

Emily took Inuyasha's hand and he picked her up and headed off back toward her mother. They arrived there not an hour later and her mother was so happy to see her daughter she didn't even ask how he was able to find her. Kagome and Inuyasha decided to leave the mall and head for home with Shippou in Inuyasha's arms.

meanwhile in the feudal era

Sesshoumaru was out playing with Rin when he got a sharp pain in his chest. He didn't know what was wrong but he knew that it wasn't good. He looked at his little girl and knew that he wasn't going to see her grow up. He fell to his knees and heard Rin scream his name but it sounded far even to his ears. Then the whole world went black on him.

Rin ran over to Sesshoumaru and tried to wake him up but she couldn't get him to wake up. She put her head against his back and started to cry. She was terrified because she had to get help and fast. She knew she had to get Inuyasha but she couldn't leave Sesshoumaru in the middle of the field the way he was. So she looked around and she found a hollow tree and knew that if she could get Sesshoumaru to the tree and get him in the hollow then he would be safe until she returned with help. So she got up and grabbed Sesshoumaru's hand and pulled him toward the tree.

Rin ran through the forest in search of Inuyasha. All she kept thinking was _I have to get Inuyasha to help Lord Sesshoumaru before something happens to him._ She fell many times before she reached the village that Inuyasha and the others stayed at. She saw a very old woman out in front of a hut and she saw Sango and Miroku. She ran over to the hut and Inuyasha's friends said her name.

Rin said, "Where is Inuyasha?"

Sango said, "He isn't here. He went with Shippou to Kagome's era. Why what is wrong? Does Sesshoumaru know you are here?"

Rin didn't say anything all she did was run off toward the well. Where she had seen Inuyasha jump into before without anyone noticing. When she reached the well she didn't stop long enough to catch her breath because she knew every second counted so she just jumped right into the well.

Back in modern day Japan

Kagome said, "Ok mom Inuyasha and I are leaving now."

They had took off for Kagome's school and hadn't noticed the bright blue light coming from the well house. Rin ran out of the well house and into the house that was there and found a surprised Kitsune.

Shippou said, "Rin how did you get here?"

Kashu had turned and was surprised to see a small human child standing barefoot in her kitchen.

Rin said, "Shippou where is Master Inuyasha?"

Shippou said, "Daddy took Mommy to school he will be back in a little while why?"

Rin started to cry uncontrollably.

A little while later Inuyasha arrived back home and found Rin in Kashu's arms crying. He went to her and pulled her into his arms where he let a soft growl escape his chest to calm her.

Inuyasha said, "Why are you not with Sesshoumaru Rin? What has happened?"

Rin said, "You have to help my Otou-san please."

Inuyasha said, "What happened Rin?"

Rin said, "He was playing with me away from the castle in the field of flowers and he fell to the ground. You have to help my Otou-san please Uncle Inuyasha."

Inuyasha said, "Tell Kagome to go to Sesshoumaru's castle when she gets home. She will know where that is. Tell her to come as soon as possible."

He left Shippou with Kashu and went to the feudal era with Rin in his arms. They headed for the field where Sesshoumaru was. Inuyasha didn't know what to expect when he got there but he knew he had to get there fast before something bad happened to his brother.

Inuyasha and Rin arrived at the field but Inuyasha didn't see Sesshoumaru anywhere. He knew that Rin had said that he was there and he could smell his scent there but he couldn't see him.

Inuyasha said, "Where is he Rin?"

Rin said, "I hid Otou-san so no one else would find him."

She got out of Inuyasha's arms and ran for the hollow in the tree on the edge of the clearing. She uncovered it and Inuyasha saw His brother was hidden in the hole. He went over to him and got Sesshoumaru out of the tree hole and held him in his arms. He could smell that he was not well but he didn't know what was wrong with him. He picked him up and headed for his castle where he could put Sesshoumaru to be in his own bed for a while.

Kagome had been there for over an hour and a half but still Sesshoumaru had not awoke. She was really worried because from what Rin had told her Sesshoumaru had looked horrible before it happened. What Kagome thought after hearing that was this _It sounds to me like Sesshoumaru had a heart attack but can that really happen to a demon?_

Inuyasha had not left his brothers side the entire time that he had been there. Kagome went into the room and knelt down next to Inuyasha. She placed her hand on his knee as he sat in the chair with Sesshoumaru's hand in his. Inuyasha never took his eyes off his older brother not even for a second.

Kagome said, "Inuyasha are you alright?"

Inuyasha said, "No."

Kagome said, "Inuyasha you can't sit here the whole time. Sesshoumaru wouldn't want you to just sit here waiting for him to wake up. He will wake up when he fells like it."

Inuyasha said, "Yeah and when he does I will be here with him. That way he will not be alone either way. I will be fine Kagome why don't you go and be with Rin and Shippou I am sure that they miss you."

Inuyasha wouldn't say another word on the matter so Kagome kissed his cheek and left to go and tend to the children. Inuyasha knew that he needed to do something so he left the room and went to Sesshoumaru's study. He sat behind the desk and put his head down on his arms. He knew that something was horribly wrong with his brother but he didn't know what exactly was wrong with him. He needed to get things out of his head so he lifted up his head and looked around. He knew that Sesshoumaru kept blank books around because that was where his mother had gotten his journal in the first place. So he looked around and saw a book with a pure white cover. He went over to it and picked it up.

The book was pure white with a blue crescent moon in the center. He opened the book and inside was a message that read:

Inuyasha,

If you are reading this then something has happened to allow you into my study. I do not know what but I can guess. It isn't your fault alright none of it is your fault. I don't want you to think that your mother's death is your fault because it wasn't and neither was father's. He chose to go and save you and your mother. I do not resent you for anything alright. In fact the one thing I couldn't say to you ever is that I love you.

I want you to do me a favor. I have been sick for a long time and now that I have Rin I am afraid that I will not get to see her grow up and choose a mate of her own. I want you to care for her as if she were your own Inuyasha. That is all that I ask of you and will ever ask of you. My illness is something I have had for a while now. I do not know what it is and I do not care to find out. All I know is that the Healers can not cure it or make it less painful. I am not sick at the moment but I will be soon I know that now because I can feel the pain just a little bit each day. I will take Rin to the field not far from here and play with her like I did when Jaken wasn't around on our travels. I know what she calls me when we are alone. She considers me her Otou-san I know that because she asked me if it was alright. I told her it was so long as she didn't say it in front of anyone else.

I have told Rin that if anything should happen to me that she should find you and leave me behind. If you are reading this then she has come to you for help. I do appreciate the help little brother although I do wish you would have left me. Inuyasha I have just one favor more to ask of you and I do not ask it lightly. If this visit is due to my illness I ask of you to end all of it. I do not wish to live in pain any longer. It has only been getting worse over the years. I was unable to tell you because you were always so mad at me. That is why I gave you the house mark now. I knew my time here was short. I have something else that you need to know.

If you look in my third desk drawer on the left you will find your journal. I am sorry that I have kept it from you. Rin gave it to me after your last battle with Kagura. When I asked you to come and talk to me I had it then. I am sorry that I have read it. Although it has gotten me closer to knowing you for who you are. The person you hide from everyone. I know I have not been there for you in the past but I had hoped to make a difference in that.

If I am unable to change how I treated you in the past just know this you are my brother through and through. No matter what anyone says you are my baby brother and I love you. I don't care if you are a half demon or not. I never did and I never wanted your sword I just wanted you to hold your head up like father and me that is all. I love you Inuyasha and please do me that favor. I know it is hard for you and always will be hard for you to do. I know I should not ask it of you but please if this is due to my illness I do not wish to live in this world any longer not with this pain. If I do not awake in a day then please send me to the next realm please. I know it is a lot to ask of you but it is the only way I know that it will be done. So please Inuyasha do me this favor.

Inuyasha couldn't believe what he was reading. It was a death wish nothing more. Inuyasha thought _How did he know I would pick this book out of all of them? I mean there are tons of books around here what made him think I would chose this one over all the others._ Inuyasha decided to do as his brother had said and he looked in the third drawer in his desk. There he found his journal and he new that Sesshoumaru had read it but it didn't matter to him any more he just wanted his brother to wake up and everything to go back to the way it was.

Inuyasha opened up his journal and turned to the page that was marked and saw that it was the passage where he described how Sesshoumaru looked when he was playing with Rin the last time. He felt bad about intruding in on his brother's privacy the way he had but he just wanted to check on him. So he turned to the very last page he had written on and found it full. So he turned the next page and took a seat then began to write.

Sesshoumaru opened his eyes and saw that he was back in his room in the castle. He had no idea how he got there until he looked over to his right and saw Inuyasha slumped over with his head on the bed next to Sesshoumaru's hand which he was holding. He was waiting for Sesshoumaru to wake up and that Sesshoumaru knew was something he was glad about. So he moved his hand just enough and Inuyasha sat bolt up and looked at him. Sesshoumaru had never seen a smile so huge on Inuyasha's face before that day. Inuyasha launched himself out of the chair and into Sesshoumaru's arms. He knew that it would probably hurt Sesshoumaru but he couldn't help it he missed him so much it was pathetic and he needed to know it wasn't a dream. Sesshoumaru just wrapped his arms around Inuyasha and smiled at him.

Inuyasha said, " I am so glad you are alright now."

Sesshoumaru said, "I am glad that Rin found you in time that is all."

Inuyasha said, "I was over in Kagome's era when she found me. I don't know how she got through the well but she did and I know that I am grateful of it."


	7. Chapter 7 Sesshoumaru's Love

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character.

Chapter Seven: Sesshoumaru's Love

Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha were walking through the garden behind the castle. They were walking together because Inuyasha didn't want Sesshoumaru going by himself after what had happened. Sesshoumaru sat near the fountain in the center of the garden and Inuyasha sat near him.

Sesshoumaru said, "Do you remember this fountain Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "Not really why?"

Sesshoumaru said, "This is where you almost died and the reason I sent your mother and you away from here."

Inuyasha said, "I don't remember that."

Sesshoumaru said, "You were three when it happened. A panther demon decided to be an asshole because you were a half demon she decided that you were not worth being alive. I was there with her and the others when she threw you into this fountain. You were not old enough to know how to swim and they all laughed when you asked for help and screamed. They laughed all the harder when you went under."

Inuyasha said, "And you stood there and let them do it. Why didn't you stop them from doing it? Do I mean that little to you Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "No you don't mean that little to me. I didn't stop them because I could not show mercy to you. I had to see if you could defend your self but when you went under.."

Inuyasha looked at him and saw that he was looking at the ground as he talked.

Inuyasha said, "When I went under what?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I only felt fear like that once after that day. I was so terrified that I had lost you and I had just stood there watching it. I knew that father had given his life for you and I could not let you die like that not after his sacrifice."

Inuyasha said, "So what did you do? I mean if you had just walked away then I wouldn't be here right now."

Sesshoumaru said, "I jumped into this fountain and I swam to where I last saw you and I swam all the way down to the bottom to get you. When I pulled you out of it everyone looked at me and threw rocks at me for saving you. They called me a hanyou lover and all I did was growl at them. They knew I was the Lord and they still did it because I saved you."

Sesshoumaru looked at Inuyasha and smiled.

Sesshoumaru said, "As I was protecting you from the others I found that you had swallowed way too much water. Inuyasha you left me here alone. We are all that is left of our kind. For us to die would mean the end of the Dog Demon race. So when they were done throwing rocks at me I got off you and I made sure that you could breath."

Inuyasha said, "You actually got me breathing again?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I did. When you started breathing the first thing you did was cry. You cried so much that they started to make fun of you. The Panther demon tried to take you away and I snapped her arm off at the shoulder. I told her that if she ever laid another hand on you that she would loose it to and that went for everyone there. I knew that I couldn't keep you safe all the time so I decided to send you away. I knew your mother used to live in a village not far from this castle so I could still watch over you two without you two realizing it. So I picked you up and took you back inside where I got you ready to leave. Your mother had already left ahead of you. She had said that you would be better off here with me away from here then with her away from me. We were family and we were demons even if you were only half you looked like a demon not a human so you would not fit in with the humans. I took you to the village and the whole village watched me walk right up to your mother and tell her that it was not safe with me any longer and that it would be better if you stayed with her in the village. I had no idea that she would be exiled from the village and sent away or that she would become ill from it too. I am sorry Inuyasha all of the bad things that happened to you is actually my fault."

Inuyasha said, "None of it is your fault Sesshoumaru and it never was. I never hated you I thought you didn't like me because I was a half demon and I knew how the demon's thought of me and the humans thought of me so I thought you considered me the same way."

Sesshoumaru said, "I would never think of you as a half breed alright. Never in my whole life have I ever wanted you dead. When you were pinned to that tree I sat there beneath it till the vine grew and I could no longer sit there. But I always went back to sit there and talk to you about everything. I never knew that you would awaken again. When I went back to the tree after a five year absence due to my duties you were not there. I felt deep loss I didn't know where you were or if you were alright all I knew was that you were not where you were supposed to be so I started looking for you. I found you with Kagome and all I saw was the bitch who put you to that tree in the first place. I was furious with you for traveling and protecting her the way you did in father's tomb. I thought it was disgraceful to allow her to live after what she had done to you. I did not know at the time that she was not the one who had done that to you for I did not know that Kikyo had even died until after I lost my arm to you. I felt so bad that I tried to tell you and her that I was sorry but you had decided I was a threat and would not listen to me."

Inuyasha said, "I am sorry that I left you alone for so long Sesshoumaru. It was not my intention to do so. Kikyo thought I betrayed her and I thought she betrayed me. But it was only Naraku all along. He will pay for what he has done to all of us I promise you that. Sesshoumaru can I ask you a personal question?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Ok what is it little brother?"

Inuyasha said, "Why have you not taken a mate? I have seen the way the females all look at you but I can not figure out why you have not chosen one to be your bride."

Sesshoumaru said, "They do not interest me actually. I do not know why but they do not catch my interest."

Inuyasha said, "You are lying. Why won't you tell me the truth? Do you think I will not approve of your choice or that I will not love you because of it?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I can not tell you the truth just yet Inuyasha. What do you mean by that?"

Inuyasha said, "You are not the only one who has been watching Sesshoumaru. I have watched you over the years and I have come to find some things out about you."

Sesshoumaru said, "What have you found out except that Rin makes me smile?"

Inuyasha said, "I know about Alkine and you."

Sesshoumaru looked at him in disbelief. He couldn't believe that his brother knew about that. Sesshoumaru thought _I have not thought about Alkine in a long time. I wonder how he is doing anyway? That last time I saw him he was pissed off at me and would not talk to me even for a minute._

Sesshoumaru said, "What about me and Alkine? What exactly do you know Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "I know you have no desire to be with females Sesshoumaru that is why you have not taken a mate. Alkine was your mate for a long time before you two had a falling out. I do not know why you had it thought. You two seemed happy the last time I saw you and that was before I was pinned to the tree. I found Alkine after I was set free. Kagome does not know about it all she knows is that a wolf demon tried to kill us. Alkine actually tried to kill us before he realized who I was and stopped. He said he needed to talk to me and that was all. So I went and talked to him."

Sesshoumaru said, "Why did you ask me why I have not taken a mate if you already knew the answer?"

Inuyasha said, "I wanted to see if you would tell me."

Sesshoumaru said, "I am sorry I did not know you knew. What did he say to you?"

Inuyasha said, "He asked me to tell you the next time I saw you and we were speaking again that he wanted to meet you on the Summer solstice in the field not far from here. Sesshoumaru the summer solstice is tonight."

Sesshoumaru thought about it and knew that it was. He wanted to see Alkine so badly but didn't know if he could get away from Inuyasha long enough.

Inuyasha said, "I will escort you there and I will escort you back if he will not. Does he know you are sick?"

Sesshoumaru said, "No I got sick after he and I had the falling out."

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru headed for the field near the castle and they were going to meet Alkine there. When they got there a wolf demon with black fur was waiting in the full moon light. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru both walked over to the wolf demon and the wolf demon turned and saw them coming toward him. Sesshoumaru felt his heart skip when he saw those wonderful blue eyes of Alkine's. He knew they were Alkine's eyes because he was the only wolf in the history of the wolf demons to have blue eyes.

Alkine said, "Well you kept your promise Inuyasha. I am glad to see that even a half demon like yourself has some honesty in you."

Inuyasha said, "Thank you. I will leave you two alone on one condition. I want you to escort my brother back to the castle he can tell you why himself."

Alkine said, "I will escort him back to the castle do not worry."

Inuyasha left them alone and went back to the castle himself to be with his mate for the rest of the night. For if his brother was going to spend time with his mate then Inuyasha was going to spend time with his.

Alkine said, "I am glad to see that you are well Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru didn't move from where he stood because he didn't know if this was a social visit or a business visit.

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I am well as can be expected. Is this a social or business visit Alkine?"

Alkine said, "It is a social one Sesshoumaru. I want to apologize for the way I acted the last time we were together. Can you ever forgive me Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I think I can forgive you. But do you even want me to go with you again after all we went through. I mean I can't think of any reason why you would want to be with us after the fight we were in."

Alkine said, "I still want to be with you if you will let me Sesshoumaru. I really want to have you back if you will let me. Will you let me come back to you Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I will let you come back to me in fact I want you to come back. But do you want to come back to me though?"

Alkine said, "Yeah I want to come back. I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to Sesshoumaru. I miss you a lot and since Kouga exiled me from his pack and tribe I am alone and wolves are not solitary creatures. You know that better than anyone. You don't like to be alone either I know that."

Sesshoumaru smiled and thought _Should I tell him now or wait a while to see how things go? I think I will wait to see how things go at least a couple of days at least. Then I will tell him that I am ill just to see if he will stay with me._

The next morning Sesshoumaru awoke to find Alkine in his arms asleep. He didn't remember going to bed or returning to the castle at all. He wondered what had happened to make Alkine sleep with him the way he was. Alkine was lying on his side with his head against Sesshoumaru's chest and his arm was over his chest curved up to Sesshoumaru's face. His leg Sesshoumaru could feel was over top of his own waist. He remembered sleeping with Alkine like this when they first got together and it was really heaven to Sesshoumaru to sleep that way with his love again. Alkine lifted his head and looked into Sesshoumaru's bright amber eyes.

Alkine said, "Are you alright Sesshoumaru? You scared me last night a little bit."

Sesshoumaru brushed Alkine's dark brown hair behind his lovely pointed ear and sighed. For he knew now what had happened. He had a minor attack of his illness nothing more.

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I am fine. I did not mean to scare you the way I did. What happened anyway?"

Sesshoumaru had to tell Alkine he knew but he wanted to make sure it was what he thought had happened and not something else and have Alkine leave him alone again.

Alkine said, "You looked fine then all of a sudden you collapsed onto the ground. I tried to wake you up but I couldn't so I brought you here and Inuyasha said to put you in here and to stay with you. So I did when I asked him what was wrong he said to ask you and that it wasn't his place to discuss his brother's personal affairs with anyone but him. So what is going on Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Alkine I am glad you have come back to me. I do not wish to loose you to anything but I have to tell you some bad news. I am afraid you will leave me when you find out so I only ask that you hear me out completely before you decide what to do. Will you do me that small favor? Will you hear me out completely before you decide what to do?"

Alkine said, "I will do you that honor. Please tell me what is going on with you."

Sesshoumaru said, "After you left me Alkine I became very depressed. I didn't talk to anyone but Inuyasha and he wasn't here with me either. He had been pinned to the Sacred Tree and he wasn't in the world of the living until his mate Kagome set him free. So since I had no one I became aggressive toward everyone and everything. I started to feel sick and tired all the time. I still feel that way even. The healers here can not help me with what is wrong with me. I know this because they have said so many times. They say I am beyond their abilities to heal because it is my heart Alkine. One of the Elders that used to fight with my father said that it was from having my heart broken then left alone for so long to fester and that made it sick but I know what made me sick Alkine it wasn't that. I am being punished by Kami for everything bad I ever did while we were apart. You kept me together and grounded and without you I guess my life just kind of became useless and out of place. I didn't feel I had everything together and I didn't feel grounded as I did when I was with you. Without you I guess I found that everyone treated me like a worthless vicious demon which I am not you know that better than anyone else. I know that it isn't your fault alright and I don't want you to think that it is your fault alright because it isn't."

Alkine said, "I won't but what are you talking about Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Like I said before I am glad you are here with me Alkine because this may be the last moments we spend with each other. I am dying Alkine I have known this for a while now but it has gotten worse and my time grows short. I do not wish to loose you but if you decide that you can not stay with me I will understand."

Alkine was silent for a while so he could take it all in. He looked straight at Sesshoumaru the whole time never taking his eyes off him.

Alkine said, "I won't leave you Sesshoumaru not now and never again. I do not care that you are dying and that you will soon leave me alone so long as I have you until that time is all I need. I love you Sesshoumaru now until the end of our world."

Sesshoumaru said, "I love you as well Alkine and I am glad that we are together again. I never want to loose you for anything in this world or the next. Even after I am gone from this world I will wait for you to join me."


	8. Chapter 8 The Truth is Out

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character.

Chapter Eight: The Truth is out.

Alkine and Sesshoumaru were inseparable now. Kagome had seen Alkine and had avoided him all together. But it wasn't to be when Alkine came into the living room where Kagome was sitting and doing her homework from her own time that had to be done since she had some rest at least. Alkine walked over to her and knelt on the floor in front of the coffee table she was working on.

Alkine said, "Lady Kagome I just wanted to apologize for the way I acted when we first met. I had just been attacked by a group of humans and you were the one I saw first and the fact that you smelled of a priestess so that only made me more angry. So I am here at this moment to say I am sorry if I harmed you or scared you in anyway that was not my intention."

Kagome looked up at him and knew he was telling her the truth about everything. She just knew that he wasn't lying to her.

Kagome said, "Thank you for telling me Alkine. I am not angry with you in anyway and you are forgiven for the way you acted toward me. I am sorry I tried to purify you the way I did."

Alkine said, "No need to apologize Lady Kagome. Master Inuyasha has told me everything about Naraku and the other demons so you have nothing to apologize for you were only doing what you thought was right."

Kagome said, "Alkine what are you most thankful for?"

Alkine said, "I guess I would have to say that I am most thankful to have my love back with me."

Alkine left Kagome to ponder what he had just said. Kagome had no idea that Alkine and Sesshoumaru were mates and she probably never would had it not been for Rin.

Kagome was in the garden dancing in the moonlight with Inuyasha. unknown to the both of them they were being watched by Sesshoumaru and Alkine. They were both smiling at how innocent and how much like them the two were.

Alkine who was in Sesshoumaru's arms said, "They look so wonderful together its too bad that Inuyasha is hiding who he really is though. They are so much like us dancing in the moonlight though."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah they are so much like us while they do that and they do look wonderful together. What do you mean by Inuyasha's hiding himself?"

Alkine said, "I have been watching him for a while now and I have seen things you would not believe Sesshoumaru. But one thing I have found that you two have in common is that you both have a taste for Wolves."

Sesshoumaru said, "What do you mean Inuyasha is in love with Kagome and she is human Alkine?"

Alkine said, "That may be but he does not feel her with the love we feel each other. Inuyasha's heart may belong to Lady Kagome but his soul belongs to another and that one is a wolf. A certain wolf we both know in fact."

Sesshoumaru said, "What do you mean Alkine? Inuyasha isn't like the two of us at least not that I have ever noticed."

Alkine said, "That is exactly what I mean Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha's soul belongs to a certain wolf that he will undoubtably go to see tonight since it is a full moon and that is the time they meet every month. Otherwise he stays with Kagome other than to go to the other human girl. The dead one which he has stopped doing since he mated with Kagome."

Alkine was right after Kagome went inside Inuyasha left for a clearing in the woods. Alkine and Sesshoumaru both followed him. They hid in a tree where the couple could not sense then or find them. They watched intently to what was happening in the clearing in front of them.

Kagome went inside to go to bed and Inuyasha had said he was going to scout then come in with her. He was in fact going to go see his other love who Kagome could not know about at least not yet. He went into the clearing where they had said they were to meet and waited for his love. Inuyasha was standing there waiting all the while not knowing that he was being watched from above.

Two hours had passed before Inuyasha felt the hand on the back of his neck. He felt shivers run down his back at his love's touch. He wasn't wearing his shirt or his Haori because Kagome had to mend them. So his love had a clear view of his bare back. The stranger gently kissed Inuyasha's shoulder as his hands went around Inuyasha to his chest. Neither of them knowing they were being watched. The stranger nipped Inuyasha's shoulder playfully and earned a single playful growl from him. Inuyasha in turn turned around so fast that the stranger had to move as not to be knocked to the ground. Inuyasha in turn pinned the stranger to the ground and knelt above him with a big smile on his face. The stranger just pulled Inuyasha down to him and turned the tables on Inuyasha. Now it was Inuyasha who was pinned to the ground as the stranger ravaged his mouth with his own tongue.

Sesshoumaru and Alkine had seen enough so they left. Sesshoumaru thought _I guess my little brother is more like me than I thought but why in all the people in the world did Inuyasha choose him. I guess I will have to talk with Inuyasha before the night is over._

When Inuyasha came back there was a note on his door that said,

**Inuyasha,**

** come to the Library when you get back. We have to talk about something and it can not wait until tomorrow.**

**Sesshoumaru**

Inuyasha had no idea what it was about but he knew that it couldn't be nothing if Sesshoumaru went through all the trouble of putting the note there in the first place. So Inuyasha headed for the Library to see Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru was waiting behind his desk for Inuyasha to come in. He knew his brother had arrived back because he had a servant watch out for him and the servant came and told him that Inuyasha had arrived in the castle. There was a knock on the huge oak doors.

Sesshoumaru said, "Come in."

Inuyasha entered the room and found Sesshoumaru behind his desk as usual.

Inuyasha said, "You wanted to see me Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru said, "Yeah I did Inuyasha come in and sit down I have to talk to you."

Inuyasha went into the Library and Sat on the couch that Sesshoumaru had indicated and Sesshoumaru went and sat down next to him and he could smell the wolf's scent on his little brother still but knew that Kagome wouldn't smell it.

Sesshoumaru said, "When are you going to tell Kagome the truth Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "What truth is that Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "That you are exactly as I am. Why did you chose a female mate if you do not actually love them?"

Inuyasha said, "I am not like you at all alright I have a mate ok and I love her."

Inuyasha got up and moved away from Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru said, "I saw you with him Inuyasha and you have his scent all over you ok not to mention the blazing mark on your shoulder from where he nipped you."

Inuyasha turned around and said, "Ok mister know it all then who was I with then? I know that you can't smell the difference between scents right now."

Sesshoumaru said, "You were with Kouga."

Inuyasha felt his heart sink at what Sesshoumaru had just said. He couldn't believe that he had been caught in the act and with his love no less. He just stood there and looked dead at his older brother.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha are you alright?"

Sesshoumaru looked at his brother for he looked like someone had hit him hard in the stomach. He got up and went over to Inuyasha and put his arms around him and held him. Inuyasha just stood there and let Sesshoumaru try to comfort him.

Inuyasha said, "Who else knows about it?"

Sesshoumaru said, "Alkine knew before I did. He told me and..."

Inuyasha interrupted, "And you followed me. Why didn't you just ask me? I asked you didn't I even if I already knew the truth I still asked you. I didn't even mean to find out about you two alright. I accidently found out about it like I did with you and Rin. You did it deliberately so we are not alike in anyway."

Inuyasha had shoved Sesshoumaru hard enough that he landed on the couch and was looking straight at Inuyasha. At that moment Inuyasha realized what he had just done and felt as if his heart had been ripped out. Sesshoumaru saw Inuyasha's face and knew that he had just realized what he had just done to him.

Sesshoumaru said, "I alright Inuyasha. You didn't hurt me in the least."

Inuyasha said, "That isn't the point Sesshoumaru I shoved you for only telling the truth that I didn't want to believe."

Inuyasha fell to his knees and burried his face in his hands and cried. Sesshoumaru went over to him and put his arms around him.

Sesshoumaru said, "Inuyasha its ok. Everything will be alright. Its not the end of the world alright."

Inuyasha said, "If Kagome finds out then I am as good as dead I know it. She will not want to be with me if she knows. That is why I kept it from her for so long."

Sesshoumaru said, "How do you know she will act that way? She could act differently you never really know."

Inuyasha said, "When I was in her time there were people just like us and she called them disgusting and I do not want her to think that of you or me. So I have not said anything about any of it. As far as she knows you haven't found anyone yet."

Sesshoumaru said, "You should tell her Inuyasha she deserves to know the truth."

Inuyasha said, "I don't trust my own judgement in the matter though. What do I do Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru said, "What if Alkine and I show her and then you can judge her reaction by how she treats us? Then you can see if you want to show her or not."

Inuyasha said, "If she treats you badly then what?"

Sesshoumaru said, "I don't need her approval you do. She is your mate not mine. Who did you have first her or Kouga?"

Inuyasha said, "Kouga is my first mate then Kagome. Just as Ayame is his second mate. We both love each other but we know for the good of our two races that we have to have a female mate as well. We just know who our heart and soul resides. Our souls reside with each other and our hearts reside with Kagome and Ayame. I know it sounds stupid but that is just how we are."

Sesshoumaru said, "I don't think that is stupid but I think it is smart. That way neither race dies out and neither of you feel guilty about it. Does Ayame know about you two?"

Inuyasha said, "Not that I know of she doesn't but Kouga could have told her without my knowledge."

Sesshoumaru said, "You should go and get cleaned up then go to bed alright that way no one will know that you were with anyone but her. That way no one will tell her what is going on before you do."

Inuyasha took his leave and went into the hot springs and then went back into his room where Kagome was waiting wide awake. She sat on the bed looking out the window and he knew that she had been that way awhile. He went over to the bed and crawled over to her and began kissing her neck.


	9. Chapter 9 Kagome's Reaction

1Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and company. I do however own the plot and any other character

Chapter Nine: Kagome's Reaction

Sesshoumaru sat behind his desk after Inuyasha had left. He reached into his third desk drawer on the left side to see if Inuyasha had taken his journal and to his surprise it was still there and it looked like it had just been written in as well. There was a fresh scent of his brother coming from the drawer. Sesshoumaru took it out and opened it to where he had left off at and read,

Well I know now that my brother's heart isn't made of Ice at least. But I know something else I can not allow I can not allow anything to harm Rin in anyway or it will kill my brother. He loves this girl with all his heart and I know that is important to him. In the end I know that I will have to leave him. I can not keep watching over him with Naraku so close. Naraku knows about my love and I can not allow Naraku to harm my love.

I will ask Kagome to go home for her test and I will have Sango and Miroku stay with Kaede and Shippou who is my son in many ways. I can not allow anything to happen to him either because I know he is as much her son as he is mine. I have to leave my makeshift family to protect my love's life.

If I do not come back and this is found by you Kagome know that I am truly sorry I didn't tell you but I knew how you would react to hearing who my love is. I saw how you reacted to the couple in your time that one time when we were walking back from the movies. I know this is something that will be hard for you but I hope that you will not think less of me or him. Kouga is my love and has been for a long time. We have been together even before I was pinned to the tree by Kikyo. I love him and he will always own my soul and you own my heart Kagome and always will. I just want you to know that I love you with all my heart. I will see you in the other world or in your time when I am reincarnated.

Sesshoumaru if it is you that has found this journal I want you to know that I know about Alkine. He wants to see you on the Summer Solstice a year from now. I want to tell you something I know you need to hear. I do not blame you for sending me away like you did. I know now that it was just to protect me in fact I have always known that. I love you Sesshoumaru and nothing can ever change that for me. I will never feel or think any less than I do now of you. I have to go and help my love before Naraku gets to him.

I will never forget any of you.

Sesshoumaru put the book down and looked out his window. He knew that what Inuyasha had written was the complete and utter truth. He knew that whatever happened to Inuyasha had changed his way of thinking. He didn't think the same way as before. He wondered if Inuyasha had written what had happened in his journal. He turned his attention back to the pages of his brother's life that he held in his hands and read,

Well I got there before Kouga was harmed by Naraku. But something terrible happened to me though. I don't know if I want to write this in here seeing as how it will be seen in the future. But I have to write it down somewhere so its no longer in my head. I need to get it out of my head so I won't think about it any more. I can't even close my eyes without seeing or feeling what I went through a month ago. It took me a month to get back to my family and you should have seen Kagome's face when I walked into Kaede's village.

Kouga helped me back to the village after he came after me. I will elaborate later in this entry. Kagome can sense the Shikon no tama shards and Kouga owns two of them they are in his legs that is why he is so fast. She must have sensed his jewel shards and she came out of Kaede's hut. I guess she was waiting for Kouga to come and tell her that I had been killed because she was already crying before we even got there. She saw that Kouga had me and she was so happy. But she was worried because Kouga was basically dragging me to the hut because I could hardly walk alone and I was slumped forward in his arms. I must have passed out half way there because all I remember is hearing Kagome's blood chilling scream of my name then nothing until I woke up three weeks later.

When I awoke I had been out for three weeks and Kagome was kneeling next to me tending to my wounds like she always does. She never allows anyone else to do except when she is mad at me then Miroku does it or Sango which ever one isn't hurt that bad. I know that Kagome was doing it absent mindedly because she didn't notice I was awake until I grabbed her hand as she tied off the last bandage and brought it to my lips. She nearly screamed and fainted when she saw I was awake. She threw her arms around my neck and said, "Oh inuyasha I am so glad you are awake. You had me so worried." I hate to make her worry about me because then she doesn't sleep for a long time without me holding her and I can't protect them all if I have her in my arms. So anyway I said I would elaborate more on what happened to me later in this entry so here it goes. I don't want to let anyone know that this happened to me but I have to get it out in the open some how.

When I found out that Naraku was going to attack Kouga I took off as soon as Kagome went back to her time period. I made sure Kirara couldn't follow my scent. So that my friends couldn't follow me in case something happened to me. I hid My diary somewhere safe and I knew that they would find it in the end because Kagome knew where I would hid it and she knew if I was gone for more than three months to get it. Because she knows that if it takes me longer than three months to get back to her then I am not coming back from where I went. I told her that myself actually. But anyway when I got to Naraku's castle I found Kagura who let me pass unscathed along with Kanna. They were waiting for me and the let me pass. I knew right there that something was horribly wrong but I couldn't let anything happen to Kouga in the least. So I continued on my way and I came to the castle itself. That's where Naraku held Kouga. I saw them together. Naraku had a collar around Kouga's neck. Kouga tried to get to me and away from Naraku but found that he couldn't. He was forcefully pulled back toward Naraku because of the chain attached to the collar. I was furious because Naraku had done this to Kouga. I knew how long it took for Kouga to admit to himself that he had no interest in woman at all but just what he has for Ayame and Naraku was exploiting that. I charged at Naraku and he pulled on the chain harder and I stopped mid run. I knew that if I wanted Kouga to be free I had to exchange something for him. That is how Naraku works you see. If you want something you exchange something else for it. Well I didn't have the jewel so I exchanged the only thing I had with me, myself.

Sesshoumaru quit reading and looked up thinking _I can't believe Inuyasha gave himself to Naraku for Kouga. He must really love him to do that. I still wonder what happened to my little brother while he was with Naraku._ Sesshoumaru turned his attention back to the journal and read:

I told Naraku to let Kouga go and he said, "Why should I Inuyasha? What have you to offer me in exchange for his freedom? The Shikon Jewel perhaps." Kouga looked from Naraku to me and said, "Inuyasha don't give it to him I'm not worth it. If he gets a hold of the pieces you have then he will be unstoppable." I looked at my lover and knew what he meant but he was worth it at least to me he was. So I said, "I don't have the Shikon Jewel with me Kagome has it with her. I have something else to exchange for his freedom though something more precious to you then the Shikon no Tama." Naraku looked at me as did Kouga and Naraku said, "What exactly is more precious than the Shikon no Tama to me Inuyasha?" Inuyasha said, "A new pet to kick around. You can have me if you let Kouga go free and I won't fight you on it. You can do as you please without me fighting you so long as you let him go." Kouga said, "No Inuyasha don't. He'll kill you if you give him that." Naraku said, "Deal." Then let Kouga go free. He went over to me and said softly to where only I could hear him, "Inuyasha don't do it. What about Kagome? What will she think of all this? Your just going to leave her all alone in this time with no idea where you are. I know she doesn't know because she would have went with you and she's not here." I said just as low, "Kouga just go home back to your tribe alright. I did this for a reason I know what I am doing. He won't kill me torture me yes kill me no. He loves to toy with me nothing more. He will get bored of me later and let me go. You just wait for my signal and come to get me alright." Kouga said, "What signal?" I said, "The one I normally give you my love." Then I walked around Kouga and went over to Naraku where I knelt at his side and waited for the collar and found that he actually put a different one on me then he had Kouga.

I was left in a dark room all alone. I didn't know what he was going to do with me but I knew that I was not going to fight him on it or he would go after Kouga again. I knew I couldn't let that happen so when Naraku came into the room I knew that he had something sinister in mind. He came over to me and put his hand around my throat and dragged me backward over to a bed placed in the far corner. I knew what he was going to do before he even did it. Naraku is a sick and twisted half breed that deserves to die for more than one reason.

I cannot tell you what he did to me because it is to painful but I can tell you this it was a living nightmare. That night I slept next to Naraku I could feel ever inch of his bare body next to mine. I did not scream, fight, or cry for anyone to help me the whole time. Over the next week I because Naraku's play toy. He did everything imaginable to me within that week. After he was tired of me being his play toy in bed he would do exactly what I said he would. He tortured me relentlessly over the next two months while using me as his personal toy. It has been a couple of weeks since then and I can still feel his hands on me. Its really scary but I will get over it like I always have. I will just lock it up with everything else that has ever happened to me. Naraku is not the first person to use me as their personal sex toy. There have been countless others before him. Not all of them are Demons either there were Humans and even some half demons as well. I know for a fact that I will be fine because the others haven't affected me in anyway so why should this one.

Like I told Kouga Naraku got bored of me and let me go. He just took the collar off one night and when I awoke there was no one at the castle at all. So I walked as best I could out of the castle and I let out a weak Howl to Kouga. He heard me and I only pray that Sesshoumaru didn't hear me and come to find out why I would howl for Kouga and not him while I was hurt. I didn't want Sesshoumaru to fell sorry for me because I don't need his pity in the least. I didn't want anyone's pity at all. I could barely see or smell anything. Kouga came to my side just like I knew he would. He asked me if I was alright and I gave him a weak smile and nodded my head. He helped me up and we headed for Keade's village and that is where I started. So now that I have that off of my chest I no longer have to hide from sleep anymore. So I think that I will go to sleep now.

Sesshoumaru hadn't known that Inuyasha had been abused in such a way before. He looked back at all the other entry's and wondered if that was what was missing in the entries. He would have to talk to Inuyasha later about it. At the moment he had to get to sleep. He knew that he was not long for this world and he wanted to be with the one he loved most of all.

The next morning everyone was in the dinning room eating when Alkine came into the room. Everyone was watching him including Inuyasha who sat across from Kagome who tensed up and eyed him suspiciously. Inuyasha knew that she did not trust him even though he had apologized for the attack she would never trust him at least not complete. Alkine went over to Sesshoumaru and hugged him from behind around his neck. The whole dinning room had went quiet after that.

Alkine still had his arms around Sesshoumaru's neck when he said, "Good morning my love. I take it you slept well."

Everyone was speechless except Inuyasha who was not paying attention to them but to Kagome. Who was watching them and waiting for Sesshoumaru's response. Even his servants were waiting. They had not see Alkine and Sesshoumaru like this in a long time. Sesshoumaru looked up at Alkine and gave him a small smile. He would have chosen his words differently had he not promised to find out how Kagome would react.

Sesshoumaru said, "Good morning to you to my love and I did."

Alkine to everyone at the table's surprise kissed Sesshoumaru on the lips and Sesshoumaru graced him with one as well. Inuyasha saw the disgust on Kagome's face and knew he could never tell her. He was going to have to keep it a secret till the day he died. He was going to have to hid his love for Kouga from his other love.

After breakfast Kagome and Inuyasha were walking in the garden when Inuyasha stopped. They were far from prying eyes and ears. He could no longer keep this to himself. He had to tell her and trust that she would not treat them any differently.

Kagome turned to face Inuyasha and said, "Inuyasha what is wrong?"

Inuyasha sat on the stone bench and looked at the ground. He let out a hopeless sigh and buried his face in his hands. Kagome went over to him and put her arms around him.

She said, "Inuyasha what is wrong? Why will you not tell me?"

Inuyasha said, "Kagome what do you think of my brother's choice in a mate?"

Kagome said, "I will not judge him for his choice. If Alkine makes him happy then I will accept it. Why do you not like it?"

Inuyasha said, "No I knew long before you all did. I knew before I was pinned to the tree. Kagome I have been keeping something from you and I can not keep it from you any longer."

Kagome said, "What have you been keeping from me Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha looked at her and said, "I love you Kagome you know that and I would never hurt you on purpose you know that. Right?"

Kagome said, "I know that."

Inuyasha said, "I love you with all my heart but my soul belongs to another Kagome."

Kagome said, "I know that. Your soul belongs to Kikyo I know that already Inuyasha."

Inuyasha said, "No it does not. It belongs to someone else that I love. Someone so special I exchanged myself for them to Naraku."

He stood up and she looked at him and said, "Is that where you were those three months you were gone?"

Inuyasha turned and said, "I had no choice Kagome Naraku went after them. I had to stop him. I did not mean to leave you for so long. I just hope you will not judge us later."

Kagome said, "Who is it that owns you soul Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha said, "You know them Kagome. You know them enough that you can consider them friends."

Kagome said, "Why do you keep using the word them? Why not she?"

Inuyasha did not look at her and said, "It is not a she Kagome. I am exactly like my brother."

Kagome got up and turned his face toward her.

She said, "Who is he Inuyasha?"

He said, "My soul belongs to Kouga."

She looked at him and said, "Does Ayame know about you two?"

He said, "I don't' know. I wasn't going to tell you after this morning but I could not keep it from you any longer."

Inuyasha fell to his knees and put his head against her stomach.

He said, "Please do not hate me for this Kagome."

Kagome said, "Inuyasha I do not hate you alright. I love you and if he makes you happy then so be it. I will not come between you two."

He said, "Kagome we both decided to take female mates as well as each other for the sake of our kind and the fact that we love you two as well. We could not choose between the two so we took both. It is allowed once in a while so we took it. Are you mad?"

She said, "No I am not mad. If you want to see him now you don't have to sneak off behind my back like you always do. I really don't mind Inuyasha if you are happy the way things are going then I am fine with it."

Inuyasha said, "When did you find out about it? I know you didn't just find out about it just now. You would have killed me or sat me if you had."

Kagome said, "Your right I didn't just find out about it. I knew that you and Kouga were together. That's why I didn't go after you when you left me so many times to go be with Kouga. I knew that you weren't going to see Kikyo because you didn't need her with Kouga. When I came back and you weren't there the others said that you went off on your own after I left. I knew that if you didn't come back within three months that I was to go and get your journal so I waited worried the whole time whether you would come back or I would loose you forever. So I waited the time and when you didn't come back I went and got your journal if I had waited only five more days I would have known you were alright. But I didn't and I read your journal's last entry only like you said to. So I read all about how you loved Kouga and all. I'm sorry Inuyasha for doing that."

Inuyasha said, "You did nothing wrong you did what I told you to do Kagome. I am just glad that you listened to me and that you will accept my choice and allow me to stay with you."

Kagome smiled and said, "I know Inuyasha. I love you with all my heart."

Inuyasha said, "I love you with all of my heart too Kagome. Kagome if you want to you can choose someone else to be with from your own time period. I won't mind that way you won't feel cheated with me having two mates and you only having one."

Kagome said, "I will think about it Inuyasha but I don't think I will choose another to be with. I love you way too much for that."

Kagome smiled and both of them sat under the Sakura tree while the wind blew through both of their hairs and the flowers came down around them. Kagome smiled and felt one of the Sakura blossoms land in her hair. Inuyasha laughed and Kagome could feel it through her back as she leaned against Inuyasha's chest.


	10. Chapter 10 Letter to my fans

1Dear fans,

I am sorry to have to say this but all my stories got deleted off of my hard drive so I have to rewrite everything. I am sorry to the fans of "the pain of loving another" and the fans of "Inuyasha's pack and Inuyasha's journal" I have to rewrite those ones. I will update them as soon as I can. I am sorry for the inconvenience.

Sincerely,

Camthalion23


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